The Comeback Coach
Richard Kaufman has overcome more than the average person. From his physical battles as well as his addiction battles Richard has found a way to not only come back from dark depths, but he has found a way to make his voice be heard. To let other veterans and first responders know they are not alone, that they too can come back from the dark depths and don't have to give in to the demons. Richards powerful message is one that every veteran should hear!
Guest Links:
http://www.richardkaufman.net/
https://open.spotify.com/show/1AVDzGn31ZRpzBdBIREhgo?si=c984c23040e74dc8
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Transcript from Episode 15 with the Richard “The Comeback Coach” Kaufman:
Keith McKeever 0:04
Hey everybody, welcome back to the bottom IoT podcast really excited to be live again this week had a pre recorded release last week. You are going to love this guest today this guy is this the man the myth and the legend. If you are circulating on Facebook world or clubhouse, and you're in the veterans, veterans network or the vets printer tribe, any of those groups, you're gonna recognize this guy immediately. I got Mitch, Richard coffin here with me today and we're gonna talk about a lot of the things he's got going on, including his new podcast, the vertical momentum. So without further ado, let's get to the intro and get to the great conversation. Welcome to the battle buddy podcast with Keith McKeever. Hey, Richard, what's up? What's up? Hey, just another day in paradise.
Richard Kaufman 0:52
Living in your baby.
Keith McKeever 0:53
I love the shirt and hat. I know where you got the heck, but I'm loving the purple Batman shirt.
Richard Kaufman 0:58
But now before we get off today, you have to ask me, Why do I have to wear a hat? And it's not because I'm going. But there's
Keith McKeever 1:06
a reason why we have different problems.
Richard Kaufman 1:10
So definitely ask me that question.
Keith McKeever 1:11
Okay, absolutely. So yeah, so why the heck, how about that?
Richard Kaufman 1:14
All right, well start off with that. About five years ago, when I started to try to help veterans that were struggling with PTSD, traumatic brain injuries, depression and stuff like that. Me My wife went to go see the movie, American Sniper. And I got so emotional afterwards, that when I got home, I got in touch with his wife, and the family. And I told him that from now on any show that I go on, even if it's live on stage or podcast, I'll wear a hat in honor of Chris, Chris Kyle, just to let him know, you know, let people know that there are people like Chris, that are willing to up to lose their lives to help let you know that you're not alone. And Chris, Chris actually got killed trying to help somebody else with PTSD. So that's the reason why were to honor Chris, but also to let people know that there are people out there like me, and you to let people know that they're not alone. And they don't have they're not struggling through this alone. And that we got there six. So that's why I wear a hat. And I've actually been invited on a top five podcasts in the world. And I said I couldn't wear it. And I told him I and I did not go on and so I cancelled it.
Keith McKeever 2:26
Wow. You know, I knew Chris Kyle's story, but I didn't know your connection to that story. So that is that is something else Richard and you are always a man of smae surprises you you were something else like I said in the intro the man the myth, the legend. There's no legend here. Oh, yeah, you're you're getting there, man. You got a great podcast. But before we get started on that, go ahead and tell us a little bit about your story. You're you know growing up your military journey, you know all that stuff. Alright, well back background
Richard Kaufman 2:57
and give you a quick down and dirty and then talk about whatever you want to talk about. I'm an open book there is I got no shame in my game. So whatever you want to talk about I grew up very poor mother was an addict. I moved for a moved around a lot. 13 times before high school. My story sounds a lot like Robert Garcia are one of our friends. And I had my first drop of alcohol at age 12. By age 13, I was a full blown alcoholic, dropped out of high school join the military at 17. Then I got into military and I became a drug addict and an alcoholic. And after two and a half years, Uncle Sam decided he didn't want me as his nephew anymore. He booted my ass out. So I get home we'll try to go home to live with mom and dad but just didn't work out, you know, going from partying all over the world to having to go to bed at 10 o'clock. Because my parents have to get up at five o'clock didn't exactly gel and and I totally understand where they came from. So they booted my ass out at you start to see a little little finger a
Keith McKeever 4:13
little bit of a trend there. Yeah. A mother know when with your parents to cramp your style, though.
Richard Kaufman 4:18
I'm the only person that you're ever going to meet that I was so bad that they actually threw me out of a crack house. That's how bad my attitude was. Eventually, I know. Mom Let me back in the house because I promised her I go back to school. I went back to school to be a bartender which was as smart as an alcoholic. I did great. I passed all the tests. And I January 1 1980 88. I got offered a bartender at a friend's bar. He was a police officer here in New Jersey. If I took the job, everything was going great, everything was going well. And drinks are flow and everything's going great. Eight hours later, I hear a knock at the door. It was him and five of his buddies coming to lock me up, because I passed out and blacked out. And I robbed the place. And I was looking at five years for grand larceny. But my parents and my uncle came up with about, he said, I'll give you 24 hours, you got to come up with my money. And you have to go to your first aid meeting. And you have to hit 98 meetings in a row, came up with the money, parents lending lender to me, I paid it all back. And I hit something like 380 meetings in a row. And I haven't had a drink since January 2 1989. Now after that, I got sober I got stupid again, and decided to join the military again. And I did join I joined the National Guard got back in which was a whole song and dance. I still had a lot of I got busted a lot, a lot a lot. I've been like he 40 He won like five six times. And adjoining the South Carolina National Guard. And you know be from Jersey and then having a smart mouth and having an attitude. They didn't take kindly to me being a screw up, did exactly ingratiate me to everybody. So I got busted again in South Carolina. And they were due to throw me out for a second time on the end of September of 2001. But September 11, as you guys know, if you guys are if you guys know me at all, I'm from New Jersey, and where I'm sitting right now, where I'm overlooking where the twin towers once stood. So, you know, growing up here, we knew people that perished in the towers that day. And now I want you to picture this, Keith, I'm sitting down on my couch, because you know, after the first plane hit, you know, everybody was it was all live, you know, there was no editing. And there were people jumping out of buildings, and hitting the ground. And here I am on looking at the TV here, and all my TA 50s on the right hand side, because I got to turn it in because I'm being thrown out again, the military for a second time. And, you know, then they shoot, then they panned to people then pulling bodies out of the Pentagon. And something broken me and I became a broken man, I actually something just destroyed destroyed me. And I actually cried out to my book that I wrote, I actually cried out to God, I said, Lord, I don't think they're going to give me a second chance, third chance in the military. But if they give me another chance, please let them keep me so I can help people that can't that cannot help themselves. And I dedicated the rest of my life to helping people that can help themselves. Now I call a company commander and I call my first sergeant. We're still friends. My company commander right now Madden 20 something years later, and they seem something different to me. So they decided to keep me thank up. And within four years, I became so soldier of the year, and I became a noncommissioned officer. And I ended up with over 23 years between the National Guard and regular army time. But um yes, the last part of my story is always I don't know how deep you want to go and I hope I'm not talking too much. I
Keith McKeever 8:48
know you're fine.
Richard Kaufman 8:50
But as you guys if you guys know anything about me, you got you know, I'm blind. And I got to use a Mr. Magoo glass in order to read anything. But what happened was I moved to New Jersey National Guard and a vehicle broke down on the highway. And in order for me to recover that vehicle, I had to back it up now as you guys know, whenever you're in a Humvee you keep your Kevlar on. But usually when you step out of the cover, you take off your soft cap, you put on yourself cap, you take off your capital, or put it
Keith McKeever 9:24
on your your belt, nine times out of 10.
Richard Kaufman 9:27
But the 10th time, I kept it on, it was a God thing. Because now this is a brand new private first drill with us. Instead of him hitting the brakes. He hit the gas in ran over the whole right side of my body and ran over my head. And that's when I had a ocular stroke. And that's what caused me to be blind in my left eye. So now, you know of course the army you can't see you can't shoot. So they decided to medically discharged me, and it took about a year and a half, I guess they call it Warrior Transition Unit, something like that. But, um, as I was there, you know, in there, I started reading books and about, you know, social media, you know, Gary Vee and stuff like that. So, you know, this is, I'm sorry, guys, but I get emotional whenever I talk about this. If you guys watch my video for today, I just find it's the whole reason that I do everything that I do today. I decided to kill myself on Memorial Day is coming up. Just anniversary, because here I am. You know, I've screwed up so much in the past. And when I got the second chance that, you know, God gave me and military gave me, I did everything I could to be the ultimate soldier. I went to every class, I went to every school, whatever they wanted, I did. You know, I got there two or two hours early, stay two hours late. I was the pecker checker, I did the pistas. I did whatever they
Keith McKeever 11:03
want to do. Well, we need to back up that no, just kidding.
Richard Kaufman 11:08
But you know, so whatever they wanted me to do, you know, to be the ultimate soldier. It's what I did. And then the day when they they said, Sergeant Kaufmann, you're no longer a member of the United States military, you're retired. And I had to hand them over my ID. It totally destroyed me. And I bought a brand new truck, like the week or month before. So I got out my truck. And I decided, you know, I'm gonna kill myself. I said, I can't take it. Because I don't know who I am. You know, I was just Sergeant Kaufman for 23 years. And now I'm PFC, nobody, private friggin civilian, nobody. And so I decided to call my wife and I called her because I knew I was never going to talk to her. And because we're supposed to be take the kids down to the shore and everything. And in New Jersey, I don't know if you guys ever been on the highways were nothing but highways here. And there's always concrete barriers. So I decided I was going to get my new truck and get up to 100 miles an hour, and put it on cruise control and turn the radio on is close my eyes. And eventually I was gonna, I was gonna be dead. So I did that I got I got up to 100 miles an hour. I turned radio on. And I feel the truck swerving, starting to move, turn the radio up, and
a song called I saw God today came on. And it talks about a man and his little girl. And I had a newborn baby home.
And I decided that moment that I didn't want to die. I wanted to be a dad, and I want to be
so again, you know, yank the steering wheel and got back right and pulled over and call my wife said I'll be there in a little while. I got to my wife. You know, she still doesn't know what happens to this day. You know, even though it's in the book and all this, she still doesn't know it. She almost lost her father three children that day. And I got to witness at home and you help girl so I'm going to kill myself. But I'm gonna eat my gun. So when I got back Monday, after Memorial Day, they called VA and they set me up with a with a doctor, a psychologist. I've been seeing seeing her for the last 11 years now. So here's the funny part of talking to my wife and I said, and I said, you know, I'm done with the appointment, the appointment went well. And I'm like, Honey, you're not going to believe this. She's like, What? She's like, you're not going to guess who my doctor's name is. And she said, her name was Dr. Seuss. It's all the same, but it's Dr. SOS, and she's been my therapist ever since. And then from that day on is when I started to try to help other people that were struggling with the same things I was. And then you know, from there on, you know, I started hearing this name Gary Vee Gary Vee Gary Vee. Now I'm in Jersey. So, but you know, sometimes my wife says My balls are bigger than my brains. So I just called up his father's liquor store. I'm like, Hey, when's Gary gonna be there? He's like, he's gonna be here Wednesday, like, alright, I'll be there. So I just went to his father's liquor store and got a chance to meet up and hang out with Gary Vee, and he's the one that really really got this thing going with the whole combat coach and everything like that. So without, you know, without his guidance, I wouldn't have a podcast. I wouldn't have my book just hit number one last week. I wouldn't have any of this stuff. It was for wasn't for Gary Vee. And I got to give a shout out to a guy named Donnie Boyden success champions podcast because he's the first one that ever had me on his show. So I want to say that so what? That's my quick down and dirty.
Keith McKeever 15:12
Yeah, no, no argue they gotta go. There's a, there's a few, a few things to talk about in there. For those that are still serving in the military, do whatever you can to get out of, you know, your analysis duty. That's, that's not fun. I had to do that a couple of times. And talk about the most. Well, you know, everybody had to go pee at some point in time. Don't be the NCO end up having to go be the P checker. That's
Richard Kaufman 15:40
it, it was pad duty, right there was weird because you're I was in recovery, you know, one time being afraid of it, having to take it. Now. I'm the guy that given it, but it was just, you know, another another course they asked me to take it. I'm like, wait a minute, so I can go there for six weeks, and take the course. Okay. Wow. I didn't know there was a course of that. Yeah, there was a course on that. And then they said you want to be combat lifesaver. I'm like, Sure. Whatever.
Keith McKeever 16:06
Send it Sure. Muscle do something in beat some of the alternatives and work right?
Richard Kaufman 16:12
Yeah, I reclass three different times just because they want to send me to school.
Keith McKeever 16:17
So you spent a lot of time in the urinalysis. You know, that's I think I was there twice that I got tasked for it and it was like an afternoon kind of thing and I was the I was the NCO that would stand by the door to be like, just be just do your thing. I won't see it. I'm in the room. I meet the minimum requirements for for via the P checker. But man, I got pissed tested. Like, I lost, I lost count 1516 times in little over five years. And I really hated it. When you'd have that guy. It'd be like all over your shoulder. You're like, Dude, we got we finished doing the nut the butt thing? We were in basic training standing in formation. You only got to be that close to me. Yeah, your head don't need to be over my shoulder. Like,
Richard Kaufman 17:04
I wasn't that guy. I'm like, Just go.
Keith McKeever 17:07
Yeah, don't be that guy. Because that guy is weird and creepy. And I never thought I'd get creeped out by another guy. But it happened a few times. But funny, funny story on my own story on that. I was down in Ecuador on a TDY for six months. 13 person team goes down there. We all come back. And 13 of us plus our squadron commander all got random urinalysis tests within a week of being back from South America. I always looked at that. Like that was random, huh? We were all down in South America. Then we all get randomly tested. Hmm. How ironic. But the other thing to point out there is Gary Vaynerchuk. Man, I've been following him for a long time, probably not as long as you got a couple of his books. And I actually got a chance to meet him myself. Three years ago in Las Vegas at the REMAX convention. They have their annual convention there. And he was a speaker. And my wife and I are walking around Vegas, we don't really gamble. We don't really drink much. So we're just like walking through one of the hotels, I couldn't even tell you what it is because up into Vegas Watson probably don't know if I'll ever go back. But we're walking through. And I noticed this camera man D Roc. And I'm like this. And then from around the corner comes Gary. And I'm like looking around. There's nobody, this is like 10 o'clock at night, which you think it'd be a lot of people in the casino, but it was nobody. And he was nice enough to take a picture with us real real briefly. But
Richard Kaufman 18:37
you know, his books really changed my life. One was The Thank You Economy. Great book. And the second one was, you know, Jab, Jab, Jab, Right Hook.
Keith McKeever 18:48
I must admit, I have not read that one yet. It's on my bookshelf.
Richard Kaufman 18:51
Great. And because, you know, like, for me, the reason why I think and I'm starting to grow a little bit is Gary says, you know, if you promote your friends 10 times more than your promote yourself, you'll never have to promote yourself again. So that's why if I ever even do a put a post out, it's always including somebody else, where it's never about me, it's always about somebody else. And I guess, you know, that's one thing that changed my life and my business was always to give, give, give and then ask once in a while.
Keith McKeever 19:21
Yeah, you know, the thing that really stuck with me about all the things because I had the audio book, crush it. And I've got a couple of his books over here. I just haven't made it all the way through, but I used to watch a lot of his videos, YouTube, YouTube and Instagram mostly. Haven't really caught much of his lately but just leading with value is something that really hit me because he said somewhere was like, Yeah, you must give all the answers. You might as well help, like just give so much value. And there's a lot of people in the entrepreneur space that are like well pump the brakes. Why are you giving all that information? But if you listen to Gary, he says, you know, who cares? 95% or whatever it is, statistic is, a people aren't going to do anything with it. Yeah, they're not going to do anything, you're just giving them the advice. They're not gonna do anything with it. Those 3% that do. So be it, you've helped them out. You've loved the value and make you know. So that's the lesson I really got from Gary but that that's a good segue into your, into your current endeavor. Because you talked a lot about you've talked a lot in the past about entrepreneurship and mental health and substance abuse and all that stuff. Your your new podcasts, vertical momentum, go ahead and tell us a little bit about that. And what you're talking about all there?
Richard Kaufman 20:41
Well, for anybody that knows me, knows that I'm a big, one of my main mentors is a gentleman named Ed my let and, and he's also a good Christian man, besides being successful in and I just wanted to, you know, was when I became blind, I had a podcast called success, your wife powers your house. And how that started out is, I just started those with GMC for 30 years. So I started talking about different products I was using, and different, you know, just doing reviews and stuff. But then when I became blind, last January 30, my birthday totally not 80% blind, but I got into a deep dark depression, but because of some of my friends, I call them my amigos, you know, do Dec. Tammy, Moses, Kurt Bausch, Daniel curry, they kind of brought me back in from the Bronx. And they're like, hey, you know, what do you do with that podcast? And then I started thinking about it. So then I, I started asking people that have worse situations than me to come on the show. You know, I've had people that had all four their limbs blown off, but they're skiing and Aspen with their family. So you know, I'm like, wait a minute, you got no legs, no arms, while you're skiing and Aspen. And I'm complaining about this, you know, the old saying that the man with no shoes can complain to a man with no feet. So I just started doing that. And then I just started branching out and getting better and better guests, bigger guests. And now it's just become, we're the number eight veteran owned podcast in the world. And it's all because of the guest. It's got nothing to do with me. Because my video my whole thing is 100% Live. There's no editing whatsoever. So it is what it is, if you say something stupid, it's not edited out. But the good thing is like, you know, me and you just having a cup of coffee together, just sitting her BS. And so I think that somebody gave me the biggest compliment. They call me The Joe Rogan of GI Joe. And that was like the biggest compliment that I ever got. So so it's just a way another way of me to give back because, you know, like, I've interviewed a lot of females that are dealing with military sexual trauma, and stuff like that. And, and I deal with a lot of, you know, post post traumatic stress, stuff like that. They're not sexy subjects, but they need to be talked about. So I guess that's what makes me different than a lot of podcast. But then I've also had athletes on I've actually had authors, a couple nine figure earners. So it's kind of It runs the gamut of like today i i interviewed had released an interview with with Dr. Shawna Springer, talking about post traumatic growth, instead of post traumatic stress. And then tomorrow, I got an interview coming out with his name is Maxwell IV. He's the blind blogger. And he's blind but he's, he has his own popular podcast books and he travels all the world around the world speaking on stages. So it depends on what you don't know what you're going to get from from the
Keith McKeever 24:13
US had, you've had some great guests and to be honest, Richard. I really honestly Glad to have you on this podcast because we're talking about some of the same things, different guests, some of the same guests. But these topics like you said, aren't sexy, that's it's not sexy, or, you know, fun to watch stories about military sexual trauma, PTSD, substance abuse, suicide, I mean, but they need to be talked about because I think for a really really long time they weren't talked about whether maybe just wasn't social media just wasn't fitting for that, you know, just had to catch to the right video and podcast age maybe that we're in now. But it's got to be talked about
Richard Kaufman 25:01
If you guys are watching this, I stopped at 22 Push Ups a day. It's bullshit. Stop it. Pick up your phone, texts call somebody call 22 people a day, text 22 people a day message 22 People do your push ups don't do shit. So stop.
Keith McKeever 25:20
I could not agree more. I do you walk right into a question that I was going to ask on that. So I think one thing that maybe that has helped a little bit with is bring some awareness to veteran suicide. It doesn't stop it, it doesn't fix it. It doesn't. It doesn't do anything, but bring a little bit of awareness. But because of social media, and people like yourself out there talking about these things, do you think we're on the verge of making any actual changes? You know, like, any actual impact on on on fixing this, or altering the course of these numbers, I will see 22
Richard Kaufman 25:58
And, um, you know, I sometimes have that same question, you know, but then I think back to the day, you know, when I first started doing my Facebook Lives, I have a Facebook Live show I do every Monday night, call them Monday, and I come back. And a gentleman said that he racked he had his 45 out, he racked it was just about to pull the trigger, when he got a notification and I was going live. And we were talking about addiction and suicide. So he he reracked it, you know, and then he called 911 right there and checked himself into. So you know, there's a little story have you got hope you have a second, if you don't mind. Go ahead. There's a little boy walking on the beach. And there's a good old man, he's walking down the beach, and he sees his little boy. And he's picking up these crabs and flipping them back in the ocean. And there's millions of them. And a little old man walks up to a little boy, you know what, oh man says What are you doing? You're wasting your time. And a little boy had a tear in his eye. He looked up at the old man. He says I can't save all of them. But you see this one? I saved him. And I changed his world. So we might not be able to save everybody. But if we can just say one, then we changed.
Keith McKeever 27:26
Yeah, I mean, if you look at the numbers over time, if if we change that narrative to 21, or 20, those numbers add up a lot over time. And that that's a really good point there that why we'd like that number to be zero. In all reality, it's never going to be zero. We deal with this too much stuff. There's too many people too many issues. We're always going to lose somebody every day. But if we could just get that number drastically lower, save lives turn turn things around. That's why I call my pet podcasts, the battle buddy podcast. I know, if people have listened to me for a while they've heard it. Because I realized on Facebook groups and I know you've seen the same thing. People are dealing with a ton of problems, their financial problems, divorce, PTSD, substance abuse, you know, suicidal ideations on military, sexual trauma, all kinds of different things. And I realized, you know, a lot of we're just reaching out for somebody. And I realized, okay, if I can talk about it, maybe somebody can take something that's actionable, and turn their life around some way, shape or form, whether it's financially, maybe they take some advice on, you know, my second episode was about credit, maybe, maybe there's, it's a financial stress, and they can take that and say, Okay, I want to fix my credit, I'm gonna go buy that house, I'm gonna get my get my finances straight. Or like you said, maybe take the gun out of their mouth.
Richard Kaufman 28:47
You know, if you don't mind me saying, but, you know, I was listening to Gary, you know, one of Gary's episodes recently. And he said, the top two social media platforms in the next two years are clubhouse, and tick tock. And, guys, if you're not on either one of those, you're losing money. And the reason why I'm on tick tock is because I found out through somebody I interviewed, that on average, between the ages of eight to 18 5000 kids attempt suicide every day in the United States. So imagine if our kids are struggling with this stuff, and now we have our their parents struggling with stuff. So if we can get to the younger kids saying that, you know, it's okay not to it's okay not to be okay. That's why I'm all over tick tock and clubhouse now to you know, maybe we can start changing changing the narrative from teenagers all the way up to adulthood.
Keith McKeever 29:47
Yeah, I think that would be huge because there's a stigma about mental health. I mean, I heard when I was in when I got back from my first deployment, they flat out said don't go to mental health, you go to mental health, I was security forces. So carrying a gun every day being on post, guarding the base there, like you go to mental health or taking your gun, they take your gun, your career is done, you're out just it's over. And so I don't know, you just find some ways to kind of adapt and say, Okay, well, I can't do that. And it takes, and I was not, I was not able to do it at that time. But it takes a heck of a lot of strength to kind of talk about your struggles. And what you're going through the things you've seen things you did witness, whatever, you know, even moral injuries, doing something that's not really inherently bad, but it's just each at the core of who you are like, that's, that's hard. And if you're not talking to your battle buddies about it, you're not talking to mental health, all you're doing is put up a wall, and everything else is behind it. And it just builds up. And it festers, festers for years. And, you know, you eventually got to let that out. Yeah, you know, that's where breaking down that stigma.
Richard Kaufman 31:01
I've interviewed hundreds of people, including, you know, General Petraeus. And one of the things that, you know, we missed the most is that camaraderie, you know, we missed that. I used to miss that, three and three, and sitting at the top of the tank, in the middle of the desert, you know, just talking shit to four of us, you know, because, you know, you become brothers, you know, you get to know, family things, you get to know them personally. And when you get out, you know, like, like a friend of ours says, you know, Nick, you know, Nick said, Nick Valentine says, you know, when you get out of the military, military, don't give a shit about you. You're just a number, and you up. And once you step off that base, you know, you're nobody anymore. You know, whether if you were Sergeant First Class, whatever, you know, your private friggin civilian now, you know, and and you lose your mission and you lose your camaraderie.
Keith McKeever 31:56
Say that your replacement, they got your your replacements number circle. Now on a piece of paper before they even painted your last your DD 214. Yeah, you know, you're just a number. And it makes sense, because the missions got to go on, we have to protect our interests around the world, that do all the things that the military does all the different types of missions. But that breaks down so fast. You know, it's, it's point blank to anybody who might be listening to this at any point in time. It's lonely on the other side, you you, you need to find a way immediately to find some sort of connection, whether it's one or two battle buddies or an organization. What you're into is different, whether it's VFW, American Legion, fam bets or local motorcycle club, Marine Corps, league, whatever, find something for somebody,
Richard Kaufman 32:46
even if you're a veteran that wants to join a business, you know, join a veteran or tribe, you know, 15,000 strong that are there for you. 24 hours a day, seven days a week. And it's free, free, free, free, free, free.
Keith McKeever 33:00
It's free, and so is clubhouse. And that's another thing I wanted to bring up because because you mentioned it earlier, the veterans network that DEP started on there, it's it's huge, it's powerful. In the last couple of months, I know you've been in rooms like this to where somebody comes in there. And they're having a problem. I was pinged into one just a couple nights ago. I won't say the person's name, but somebody was struggling. They started a room with the title that they were struggling and somebody else jumped in there started pinging people it as soon as I saw the list of people that was in there, and the title, I immediately had jumped in. And I was in a great room with a great conversation. But I knew at that moment, a battle but he needed me and I talked to this person a couple of times we I mean, I mean, I know his name, no little bit of a story. But that's that's about it. And it was amazing to see that for the next two hours after that. There was at least six people in that room at any given point in time. Nobody left that room until he said, I'm okay guys. I need to go to bed. I got to get up for morning, you guys have helped you guys, you know, allowed me to kind of just vent and talk. And it's one of those things. We may have saved life that night just by being there in that room. And that's just that's an incredible feeling to know. And all I did was just jump in and talk and engage in conversation, get the guy's mind off of things. Let him kind of call himself down. What he was going through was a lot. But there's a lot of power there. Those conversations a clubhouse or just even even the positive ones entrepreneurship. Yeah, you know, people just building connections, business, business deals, all kinds of stuff going on there. It's incredible. That's another wonderful place to get free.
Richard Kaufman 34:41
And now it's open to Android so you don't have any excuses.
Keith McKeever 34:47
You will waste some time if you're not careful. But it is a great place to have conversations though and meet certain people and you know, I find myself jumping in the same rooms of certain people. If I see him in a room I'm jumping in there, you know, just because you build that connection. And it's not all of our military either. I mean, some people are their, their, you know, their parents were in the military or their military spouse, and, you know, you just, you're always in these rooms, and you're talking and you build these connections. And it's, it's really cool, you know, helps me, you know, and I haven't never had a need for help, like, raise the flag, I need some help. But it's a cool way to have a conversation with some people get your mind off of things, you know, kind of unwind a little bit. Yeah. So it's a wonderful place to connect. So I'm glad you kind of kind of went there. On clubhouse? Have you seen anything different? What's your take on clubhouse? Oh, very curious.
Richard Kaufman 35:40
I love it. Because, like, if I open up a group and vertical or any group that I open up, it, the groups that I have, are the rooms that I have, I'm sorry. They're very small bite on purpose. But it's very powerful. Because we'll get into deep talk, we'll get into real talk. So a lot most of the time if I have a room on call house, it's about mental health. Sometimes it's about podcasting. You know, sometimes it's how I, you know, I help build a million dollar your business, but it's mostly about anything health, fitness or addiction related issue stuff is when I open it up, so usually my rooms are like 1012 people, but it gets really deep. people crying, people getting emotional, but people are getting help. So that's why I do it. And of course, I don't make any money off of it. Some people are trying to become a what do you call
Keith McKeever 36:41
influencer? Oh, yeah, absolutely.
Richard Kaufman 36:45
Are they are they start calling calling themselves? influencers? And that's, that's just not me. You know, it's like somebody said, I got a message on. He's like, you're such an influencer. I'm like, Dude, I'm like, I'm no influencer. Because when I get off here, I got to go. Clean up the crap of a 14 pound dog. So to Richard. So you know, you don't you know, we're never Zuko word of wife is not going to take out the garbage. So stay humble, and stay teachable. You know what I mean?
Keith McKeever 37:19
Absolutely, I was. I've been involved in a couple of conversations over the last couple of days with some people about that about people being fake in there. And unfortunately, that can happen, you have to be really careful. If you stop in some of those in those rooms, and people are trying to pitch something, it sounds too good to be true. Or they sound like an expert, please, that that stuff before you. You know, start up a business deal with them or give them some money to fix something or whatever. You can get taken advantage of real quick, but
Richard Kaufman 37:49
you know, and that's one thing that I specialize. I do specialize in businesses, too. You know, you got to be real. Like, if you guys know me, I'm the same goofy guy here that I am at home. Like when I went to the military influencer conference, you know, I told Stephen Kuhn told Lane blown, you're all getting hugs. I don't care who you are. And you know, when you go up to you know, Steven Cody's, like, 6364. You know, and, and I wrap my arms around him, he's like, you were serious about how fake? Yeah, cuz I'm the same guy, you know, on social media than I am at home. And I think a lot of that that's why I think I'm a little bit more relatable than some people is because it's the same goofy guy that you're going to see here or out in public with a family. I don't have to put on any airs. I am who I am. And I think, you know, like Gary Vee says, you know, the market is the market. And you if you are fake, you are gonna get found out last
Keith McKeever 38:45
year be found out easy. It's Oh, man. Yeah, there's, there's people everywhere. You know, I'm in real estate businesses, you know, and I laugh sometimes the stuff I see in there, you know, people posing with Ferraris and stuff and their million dollar listings. And I'm like, really, very that many people that are big ballers like that. You know, I drive a Ford Fusion. I wear our button up shirts that are uncomfortable. I wear blue eyes, blue jeans. It's a boots. Like, I don't wear three piece suits and fancy flashy cars. Like that's just not me. And why the heck would I spend money on that, but there's so many people out there to just wear, like, fake it till you make it. I hate that.
Richard Kaufman 39:25
Nobody got to be real. No, I think now, but now, there's also new grooves that are coming out where everybody's saying I'm authentic. You know, I'm being real, and given hope that there aren't. You're like, Wait a minute. I just think you know, I'm a guy if you guys know me, I don't drink. You know, I've been cleaning out 30 years. I don't go clubbing or anything like that. But like you see all these guys and some of these people that say, you know I'm a family man. I'm a Christian. And then when when I seen them out in Vegas, when they went to the company party. You know, all of a sudden you're popping puddles of dawn, and you're at a club and you're like, Yeah, grant, we know who the real you is. And, you know, I think authenticity is just being you, you know, like on your podcast, you're you. And, and that's what's gonna make you more relatable. And people are going to want to watch you because they don't see that fakeness they don't see that bravado.
Keith McKeever 40:27
Well, hope so. I hope people are watching. There's a couple of watching now. My wife and my kids,
Richard Kaufman 40:34
you know, what if it's just that one person down the road six months down the road at yours? And that's what no one that matters?
Keith McKeever 40:41
Oh, totally. Yeah, I thought that from day one. Because I've, I've read that a lot of podcasts are stopped by, you know, Episode Seven. And this is episode 15. So I've already you know, I'm already past double that. But I always told myself two pieces of advice that I picked up somewhere, your worst episode is already out. So you know, no matter how bad you screwed up, you know, keep it in the back of your mind not to knock or make it sound like, you know, I've had bad guests. But you know, you got to continually improve. Yeah, just it's constant improvement. You got to go back and reflect on one get on this episode. What went bad? Should I formulate better questions? Or? Or should I have eliminated questions, whatever. You got to reflect on that stuff.
Richard Kaufman 41:22
In your life, like there's 2 million over 2 million podcasts out there. But only 50% of them are active. And only 10% of them go past? Episode Eight. Yes. Oh, if you figure if you're 15. You're already in like the top 30 40%.
Keith McKeever 41:42
I like that. See, I like that positivity. Richard, you just changed my whole day right there? Well, we get 40%. I'll take top 60%. Like,
Richard Kaufman 41:52
I got notice that we were top 5% in the world. We just hit on our show. So if anybody's on the guest, thank you. It's all about you.
Keith McKeever 42:07
And I, you know, back to the other point, like, you're right, these videos, or the audio podcast, or things on my website. They'll be out there for a long time, forever. And well, yeah, forever. Less less technology drastically changes. Who knows what's next beyond video, but it could be six months down the road can be six years could be 16 or 20 years. And somebody could watch it. I mean, you can go back and watch video, you know, silent films from the 1900s. So this stuff is out there. And your words today could save 1015 2030 lives. You know, who knows you'll never know forever,
Richard Kaufman 42:49
that wants to start a podcast. Do it. Do it now. And everybody you know, a lot of people say well, I don't have the camera. I don't have this blah, blah, blah. If you ever watched there's a video of Gary going to a garage sale, and it's captured on his iPhone. It has had over 15 million views. And this is a picture of him at a garage sale. So you don't need all the extra stuff. You don't need all crazy stuff. All you need is your iPhone or Android. So if you're thinking about starting a podcast, the best day to start it was yesterday, but started today.
Keith McKeever 43:24
Absolutely. I I think my mic is like 60 bucks. I didn't say anything big. The the webcam has maybe a $30 webcam. You know, I've got the pro version of stream yard here to be able to do some other fancier stuff. But I'm going to I'm going to quote Layne billowed from the veterinary or tribe. When he said he always talks about imperfect action. You just got to do something. And that's kind of like to my point earlier, like, the the whole my worst podcast is out there. Like you just have an imperfect action, just do it and reflect on what you did. And figure out a way to approve go forward. You know, I mean, like, you know, full transparency before we hop on, I attack issues. Go figure. It happens. Normally, it's audio, we got the audio work, and then the video went down, and I had to reboot the whole computer. That's the reason why, you know, we made about 10 minutes before, but all kinds of crazy things can happen. You just have to roll the punches and reboot the computer log back in and here we are. And you know, it's just that imperfect action just take the step because it's nerve racking when I was thinking about doing this and get to the first episode and say gee, what do I do? How do I do this? You know, I didn't I don't think I really learned anything until episode two or three.
Richard Kaufman 44:41
If you're afraid of doing video, you can also go through anchor and do audio only like I do. Absolutely. There's no excuses not to do it.
Keith McKeever 44:50
Aker is actually what I use. And you know, you hit on some things earlier like just just doing video that's why I'm doing these live because with my schedule is It made sense this year to be able to do it, I knew I could do it every other Wednesday, just do it live the videos out there, all I got to do to go to YouTube after this, fix the description and drop the cover image on it. And it's done. Download the audio, do some simple tweaks, like I do like five or six steps just to clean things up. And I posted to anchor and I can be done within a couple of hours after the podcast, it doesn't take a whole lot of effort, just try and clean it up a little bit and get something out there. And I would love to be at some point sometime where commission I and my let earlier, you know people with some huge podcasts like, we also have a production team and really cranking out stuff but you know, baby steps,
Richard Kaufman 45:36
you just constant proven time when things are ready to happen. You don't happen?
Keith McKeever 45:42
Absolutely. You got to trust. Yep. So I had a couple other questions for you. One of them was about substance abuse. And I know you had a drinking problem. We know our country has been in the midst of an opioid opioid pandemic here for a little while, whether or not it's opioids, or alcohol or whatever. You know, what advice you have for somebody who, you know who's at that point that they know they need to get clean? I know that's a key, you know, you have to want to but how do they push me on that to actually, you know, try and do some, you know, any advice for them?
Richard Kaufman 46:20
Well, for me, I try to be as open and honest as you can I can be those commercials where it says you can go get clean and sober in California at Malibu, and you can get massages and look at the ocean. It's bullshit. For me, you know, I went to 300 meetings in a row, it cost me 300 bucks to get sober. So get your ass to a meeting, ask for some help. Because there's people that are there that are in the same boat as you are, and you're willing to help you out. And it doesn't cost you anything. And if you don't have any money, you don't have to give them anything. So just get to an AA meeting an NA meeting. Or you know, now the VA has an amazing system to call the VI if you're a veteran called VA, they can get you into an end treatment program. And I have about five or six of my friends that I helped get into in treatment programs. They're totally, totally great, and are totally free. So definitely, that's something I would try to do.
Keith McKeever 47:26
I think the VA some of the VA programs are really underutilized. I don't think a lot of people know enough about what what the VA can offer. So great advice there, Richard. So before I get to my final three questions that I asked everybody, I want to ask you a question kind of takes a little bit of reflection. So was it maybe six months ago, you you did the veteran social Summit, you told your story? You know, today I decide that developed into its own mental health summit, which was awesome. By the way, I think I tuned in for about 95% of the whole day. And so I'm just kind of curious, what kind of feedback have you gotten from that when you when you partner with with Ryan and made that happen?
Richard Kaufman 48:08
I've had so many people that have I mean, and I've even had family members that actually went to the event. And they got so much out of a net story, dealing with second military sexual trauma. You know, with Tammy, her story, Robert, nobody knew the stuff that Robert Garcia went through, until he told his story. So everybody has a story. And I believe that everybody story should be told. So I've had a couple people that actually messaged me or texted me, and they've actually got help, or actually checked themselves into rehab to get help. So it's been a life changing thing. And I'm hoping to make it go maybe state statewide, and eventually, worldwide, like a monthly thing. Today, I decided all around the country and went, none of the speakers got paid. It was all just to help people out. So nobody made any money off of it. And it was done on purpose. We did that on purpose. So we can help other people without having to worry about oh, he's just getting paid to say this. So everybody that did it, they did it out of their heart. And today I decided it's I think it's good to start taking off and on on its own to be doing some bigger things in the future.
Keith McKeever 49:35
Well, I certainly hope so because I got a lot of value out of that as is I kind of go on my own path of kind of working through things and just to hear other people's stories and just as far as a little bit of hope you know other people been through different things, similar things whatever and they're all successful everybody you mentioned there I've connected with a handful of them the other ones I know where I've listened to their shows themselves and and some good stories and That was that was an awesome day. I was I was really curious what kind of feedback I did not expect. I guess in the back of my mind, I didn't expect, you know that it helped people that much, you know, where they wouldn't check themselves in or really got the help that they need, like.
Richard Kaufman 50:16
And then, you know, like, a lot of questions got answered, like when John crow tech, you know, when he talking about what he went through, and then also talking about some of the medicinal stuff like CBD, so it had a whole wide variety of different topics, it wasn't just one certain thing, it dealt with the mental, the physical, the spiritual, the mind, the whole body. Because usually, when there's something wrong with either the mind body or the soul, they're all off. So, you know, we got to try to have balance, and you know, get everything healthy. So that's what I think it was great, because, you know, it was about the mind, the body and the spirit.
Keith McKeever 50:59
Well put that that that is definitely true, you got to kind of work on all that can't just attack one. Just one because then you're neglecting everything else. So that brings me to my final three questions. And I don't know, if you if you know what these are. These, these, uh, these questions get get pretty interesting. I'm always surprised what my guests come up with. So the first one, what advice would you have for somebody looking to get out of the military today?
Richard Kaufman 51:25
First, I would say, keep every single piece of paper, every document, three, four triplicates, make sure that you have everything documented. And if you're 12 months out, I want you to start working on an SOP of what you're going to do when you get out. Because you know, they the military has this? What is it like a taps program? You know, a joke, honestly, yes. So you know, you're just out on the street. And if you're looking to get out, try to think what you want to do when you get out. And then find a mentor. That's doing what you want to do before you get out. So you can actually start working on it as you're still in and getting ready to get transition out. Because that year goes by quick. And that money goes by quick. So you know, make sure you find a mentor, and whatever you want to do when you get out. And by the way, get on LinkedIn. If you're not on LinkedIn, you're losing money, join LinkedIn, even if you're still in the military, get on LinkedIn.
Keith McKeever 52:27
I think that's the only valuable thing they teach you in tax is to get on LinkedIn. I don't know if they really got to reflect back 10 years. But I don't know if it was anything more than just get on LinkedIn. And it's really important. And you got to have a resume. Like, that's really all I took away from the taps or whatever that gets called near force. But yeah, that's a good one. an SOP. Yeah. Plan for sure.
Richard Kaufman 52:51
One thing in the military, we all know is what an SOP is, you know, we all know what a line line is. So why don't we do the same thing with our personal life in our career? You know, because like even I'm a big shark tank guy. And they even say all the time, if you don't have a business plan, you don't have a business, you have a hobby. So make sure that whatever you're doing, you have an SOP,
Keith McKeever 53:19
absolutely solid flip the script now, anybody who's young, and they're thinking about joining the military, what kind of advice would you have for them before they sign on that dotted line and raise their hand?
Richard Kaufman 53:31
Definitely do it. I loved it. The first or the first time I loved it way too much. But the second time, it's how I grew into being a man. It's how I grew into building, learning how to build relationships, how to work as a team, how to be a team leader. And then you learn also about people from all walks of life. And now in because I wrote in my book that, you know, one of the one of the most popular chapters in the book was the day that I got cured of racism in 1986. But, you know, once you join the military, you travel the world, and you get to have more experiences, because you can always go back to your hometown. And he was there. Yeah, the same people that they haven't done anything but work at Walmart, you know, they haven't traveled the world like you have, they don't have experiences like you have. So I would definitely take time to do it. And if you want to go to college, it's definitely a great way to get your college in the future.
Keith McKeever 54:38
It's a good one. The education benefits are definitely worth it. It's gonna stress the heck out of you though. Right, just finishing. finish that up myself. That is a pain in the butt to be the old guy in class, but it is a great way to get the education paid for. Yeah, you definitely don't want to go get an education and have to pay for it. So finally, And
Richard Kaufman 55:00
that's why I started a podcast. So now I can get an MBA in business for free. Because now I can invite millionaires and billionaires on, ask them what I want to know that I'm getting an education for free.
Keith McKeever 55:15
That's a darn good way of putting it. So the last question I got for you, and before I put you in the back room and play my little outro video is, uh, give me an opportunity to give a shout out to any kind of veteran organization or organizations that that you think are doing some good things out there that that you'd like to shine a light on? Oh, well,
Richard Kaufman 55:36
of course, you know, I've been into vet vet ShopRunner tribe, almost from the beginning. Mean means even we had our run ins. He sees buddy straight my ass out a couple of times. So definitely the veteran or tribe if you're a veteran, but also I'm also aligned with a friend of mine, his name is Malikai. And he has, he has a 5013 C. So yes, it is real. It's not BS. It's called a warrior's garden. And it helps veterans that are struggling with PTSD, traumatic brain injury, depression, it helps them get back into gardening, and actually using their hands and getting a little bit piece back in their life. So that those are probably the two biggest things that I'm involved with right now.
Keith McKeever 56:19
That is an interesting way of doing it. hurdle hurt a lot of ways to try and you know, get people's minds off of things. It gives us the skills and address some things but gardening? That's a first That's awesome. Yeah.
Richard Kaufman 56:33
So it's really cool out there called a warrior's garden, you
Keith McKeever 56:36
know, plus, you can plant things and grow it. And then when you you know, you can, you can taste the rewards of all your hard work and effort. Yeah, so that's something tangible.
Richard Kaufman 56:46
And like I said, it's a, it's legit. It's a 5013 C, so it's not one of those fly by night. He's been doing it for many, many years. And he's out of state. So if you guys, anybody in Tennessee, definitely check them out.
Keith McKeever 56:58
Absolutely, yes, give me the information. Because, you know, I'd love to try to build on my website, a lot more resources and kind of give some shout outs to nonprofits. But thing is or somebody out there, and I don't want to just put one on there unless somebody knows somebody connected that organization, or I've talked to him or, you know, somebody's been through it themselves, or has a first hand knowledge. You know, don't want to go to point somebody that directs yourself that it hasn't been kind of vetted in some way, shape, or form. So
Richard Kaufman 57:28
you know, people know me. If I don't believe in a product, I will not use it. All my sponsors, I have 20 different sponsors for the show. If I, if you if I don't believe in your product, I will not even put it on the show. I will not promote it. Because you know, even when I was in the health and fitness industry, if I didn't use the product, or if I didn't try the product, I would not recommend it. Because how can I say it's a great product in my heart, if I know it's crap, I can't do
Keith McKeever 58:02
you must know a lot of trying different vitamins and minerals and supplements you.
Richard Kaufman 58:07
I used to, again, my house, I have a whole cabinet of just supplements over the last 30 years. And some of them were good. Some of them were crap. And but if you're a supplement company, and you sent me a product to try, and I told and I tell you, it's crap. And a lot of times like there's a company, I'm not going to mention her name, great company. I just don't want to get sued. But products tasted like crap. But they worked amazing. So when somebody would come in, they'd be like, I want to pick up this product. I'm like, I'm telling you now. It tastes like crap. But it works amazingly. And so when the guy came back, he's like, You know what? stuff tastes like crap. But it was amazing. So I always think, you know, you always have to be honest, in whatever you do. Because if you don't, it'll come back to bite you in the future. Yeah,
Keith McKeever 59:03
that guy can easily walk back in and say, Hey, Richard, man, you didn't tell me that tastes like dog crap. Like, they asked you for that stuff. You know,
Richard Kaufman 59:11
if you guys you know, if you watched my video on today, I decided, you know, when I opened up, I said, you know, this video is not for 99% of you. It's just for one person. So, you know, a lot of people were like, What do you mean, it's not for me? You know, and a lot more people listen, because they knew I wasn't I told him. You know, even when we do the veteran social Summit, I'm not there for your wallet. I'm there for your heart. And I think that's what makes me different.
Keith McKeever 59:41
Yeah, no, that's that's really deep, because 99 or so percent of people who watch that, I love to hear your story. And you feel a connection to that and it's just an amazing story and it's inspiring. Just A lot of emotions that come out, you know, listening to your story and other people's stories. But there's not one person out there that has, has it cocked and loaded, or they've got the needle in the arm. And like, it's it's time to change the shit now, like, right now, like it's an emergency but but the big my, my earbuds up into animated over here. But yeah that you know that's that one person that needs to hear right then and there,
Richard Kaufman 1:00:26
you know, and that's why I came out with that today I decided, you know, because for people that are listening, if you don't know what that means, it means that the three most important words in the English language are today I decide. Because once you make a decision, then all you have to do is act upon it. Because we've all ran over squirrels, right? We've all ran over a couple. But the reason why most of them get ran over is because they did not make that decision to get out of the way. So that's why I say the most important words in English language are today I decide. So if you're struggling out there, and you need help, get help now. Do not wait, pick up the phone, get help now.
Keith McKeever 1:01:08
Decide today. And I right there at the bottom of screen. I've got your website there. Reach out to me, Richard, you know, we'll get you pointed out, you know, whatever direction we can hook you up with whoever we can to help fix whatever whatever we can do. Okay, and not miracle workers. But
Richard Kaufman 1:01:26
if I don't know, if I can give you the answer, I have a huge veterans network, somebody has the answer.
Keith McKeever 1:01:34
Absolutely, there will definitely be somebody especially in the veteran or tribe and all those other organs groups were in. So that's a great place to leave it. decided today, you know, really decided today to better yourself better your situation, better your family, whatever, you know, decide today, make that decision, make it happen. And like I said earlier, we're laying below imperfect action, decide and start taking some action, because without the action, it's not gonna happen. So our Richard, I will put you in the back room here, and I'll catch up with here in a minute. And that is it folks. Thanks for tuning into the episode today. We really appreciate you taking a listen or watch. Please remember, we have website www battle buddy podcast.net. We're always trying to add more resources there. So please go check it out. And if you have ideas for extra resources, please reach out to us and let us know what you think we can add to the website. Don't forget, you can listen to this podcast places such as Spotify, Apple Music, Google podcast, anchor and many more. And don't forget, hit the like and subscribe button on any of our social media channels. And finally, if you're feeling like you're at the end of your rope, and you need some extra help, please reach out to a battle buddy. Or you can call the National Suicide Hotline at 800-273-8255 No matter what you do brothers and sisters get the help you need. Because we want you here tomorrow
Transcribed by https://otter.ai