The hustle and bustle of life, especially the past couple years, can lead to many negative feelings and sometimes a feeling of being unbalanced. Nefertiti San Miguel joins the showing in this episode to talk about how to bring more zen into your life. How to find ways to declutter your thoughts and physical spaces to bring in more happiness and purpose. She also discusses the ancient Japaneese art of Ikebana and how nobles and Samurai would use this art form to help calm themselves and bring about some balance to their day. Floral designing has become more of a feminine thing in our culture but Nefertiti is on a mission to show veterans that this ancient art, once practiced by the top warrior of their time is perfect for those wanting to slow down and find more zen and balance to their life.

Battle Buddy Podcast Guest Links:

www.etniafusion.com

https://www.linkedin.com/in/nefertiti-san-miguel-4a9954196/

Transcript from Episode 85 with Nefertiti San Miguel:

Keith McKeever 0:00

Hey everybody, welcome back to another episode of the battle buddy podcast, we're gonna have a fascinating conversation today. If you are into artwork and healing and holistic approaches to things, and kind of setting up a Zen environment, they're gonna wanna pay attention today. My guest today is a ball of energy. She is an expert in Ikebana I hope I didn't miss pronounce that she will definitely let me know if I did. But art therapy, living through that creative lifestyle, things like that, and how that can help manage stress, improve your life, things like that. So if that's something of interest to you, you definitely wanna pay attention. Before we get into it, make sure that you like and subscribe and follow the channel. And my guest as well.

Keith McKeever 0:46

Welcome to the battle buddy podcast with Keith McKeever.

Keith McKeever 0:52

fotd Welcome to the battle buddy podcast.

Nefertiti 0:56

Good afternoon from little Cambridge, Massachusetts. So thrilled to be here, at least in the virtual space with you, thanks for the invitation. And I get to be passionate about my craft and sharing with your audience. And it's a beautiful thing to be John delighted to. And the yield is strong as a guest, the podcast that you are so graciously hosting. And you know, I have been following your work and some of your guests and I have nothing but praise. It's full of valuable content, whether you are a veteran or you are a supporter, it's very good content that he brings a lot of value and substance to many aspects of life. So I'm cheering you up all the way around and delivering, you know, as much information from what I do, and with the idea that he's going to be of use and service to some people the same way that you have been for me.

Keith McKeever 1:51

Awesome. I appreciate the kind words. And I'm always excited to bring somebody on to talk about things that I know very, very little about. I mean, I may have been stationed in Japan, I may understand like the idea of like Zen environments and Fung Shui and other things like I kind of get it, but I don't know it all that deeply. It like we had had a long conversation a few weeks ago, and I told you I wasn't creative. And I realized that I am kind of creative in my own little ways. I'm not creative with like drawings, you know, and folding things. You know, if you want to stick figure, I can do that really good for you. But that might be about the limit of my artistic ability in that role. But yeah, I mean, I knew from the moment that we were connected in your contests and our past guests in mind a couple of times, and a good friend of mine, she she recommended you. And when we first started talking, I was like, wow, okay, that's really interesting, you know, Zen environments, and, and you're tying in mental health and just living a better life and all of that through art therapy, and some of the things I'm like, fascinated, love it. So it was a slam dunk. And I met in the intro when I said you were a ball of energy. So I educate us on some of these things today, which is awesome.

Nefertiti 3:10

And I am already feeling accomplished, because that's my mission. I'm very passionate about educating, but also not just them. Tactical part of the academic part, I am more into let's put into function and application. So you make it a lifestyle. That's what it's important to me. Because you can be learning things whole day long and every day of the week. But if you don't apply those pieces of information to something that is going to be suitable for your lifestyle, then it's a waste. And my approach is very dynamic, organic, and very intentional. Like for example, I recently taught a class at a local library. And I know that for the most part, some people will present on their various structure fashion, and they do cookie cutter, the same class repeats over and over again. I showed up overloaded with material, things for show and tell. And I went around the table that had 15 people attending because he was bad weather. So I feel accomplished. 50 people on the inclement weather, that was a total success. And I asked each one of them, what are you looking for? What is your idea of success, and I craft a class on the spot in front of them base where he was going to be of service to each one of the attendees. So that's the way that I like to present myself. And that's the way to make better connection. Because when you show interest on the receiving person of your knowledge, then they can feel that sense of bonding, and then you are paying attention to their needs. It's not about the frame of being a guru from Ah, I don't do well with that. I like the interactive the connection, and the epic memories, because that's how you build those fun times that you're going to treasure later on. So, right here right now, these are the good old days, and let's get that roller, right.

Keith McKeever 5:16

Absolutely. So tell us a little bit more about yourself, some of your background and what you do and things like that.

Nefertiti 5:25

I will start by saying, I am based in Boston, I have lived in 10 Different states within the country, I have lived things so the America, the Caribbean, Polynesia, a United States. So my cultural background is very diversified and very eclectic. And that makes me a very unique individual, how I look at life, and how I present my craft to the world. And because I have moved so many different times, I pick things from different cultures, and then I apply into my daily life. So it becomes a lifestyle, I have this passion for cultural diversity, because I think that it makes the world a better place to embrace the opposite. You know, let's be happy with the similarities that you have. But also embrace the diversity and the difference, because that's why it's going to enrich the connection and the relationship. So you get to be experimental, and explore things that otherwise you will no be exposing yourself to. So that's kind of the cultural aspect of it, then from the professional side, I have been very dedicated to teaching and performing since 2007, started as a way for me to keep my mental sanity and just do some community work, then I realized that there's a lot of people out there making money in something that they are not even all that skill. And I decided to take it upon myself to do dos educational programs, because like, for example, I sign up for the class. And that was back in 2007. When I was in South Florida, the woman who took the class, she's supposed to be an educator, and she has all these degrees and fanfare. And she left a lot to be the same as saying the visual, and as a teacher, as well. So I look at those experiences. And I said, well, I need to be the change that I want to see in the world. So I'm very passionate about teaching, because that breaks ignorance. And that is a very important topic for me. And then I connect that to a holistic way how to carry your life for mental health and inner peace, because people talk about money and success and businesses. But reality is that only last you are happy with yourself from within. Unless you have inner peace, there's no true success, their success, it can be from the outside. But then when you are by yourself with nobody around to give you the lip service, then you know that you are empty inside and then you sink into depression, then you engage into substance abuse. And if you put the two on too close to each other, then you're going to realize that if you are truly happy and peace with yourself, there's no room for self sabotage, or substance abuse or mental issues. But nobody talks about that approach. And again, here I am making the noise in the world, I'm bringing the changes that I want to see.

Keith McKeever 8:51

Well, we can almost wrap right there. Fact, one of the you know the cultural thing, as you were saying that I'm one of those people where I just don't understand why there's so much hate in this world for people of other cultures, religions, etc. I feel like you learn so much more about yourself. When you learn more about other people and other cultures. It allows you to reflect a little bit more of who you are, and what you may or may not have in your culture. And it just, it just brings people together, right when you when you are just naturally curious, and really want to know and engage with other cultures. You really learn more about them, you learn a tremendous amount about yourself. It's it's a win, win, win, win. You know,

Nefertiti 9:38

I have to tell you a very personal story. And this is first time that I'm making these public and this is a recent realization that I had that sometimes you have a cultural issue in your household and nobody has a grip on it. And the reason What I'm saying this is that people engage into relationships. And there's a underlaid of hatred that comes to surface when they procreate. I am the product of that I am on once a child on my father's side that were Portuguese, French and Scandinavian. From the time that the Scandinavians migrated to Normandy in France, and they got converted from Vikings into Christianity. So then, oh, my biological mother sigh, they are gypsies from mainland Spain. And a whole bunch of makes up their Japanese media lease term, Polynesian, and people from the Canary Islands. So as time progressed, I was the recipient from both of my parents of certain passive aggressive behavior that I couldn't quite understand until I got into neuroscience. So on my father's I, I will be no good enough like a gypsy, I couldn't do anything writing besides, then, on my biological mother sigh in her mind, I watched yours as cheap as the Portuguese people that came fleeing from the war. And I was a recipient of these two different layers of viewing on each other's culture. And, um, half of each one, you see them hot mess.

Keith McKeever 11:39

So like, yeah, that makes perfect sense. I never thought about it like that. It's very eye opening.

Nefertiti 11:45

So when I take it upon myself to be culturally diversified and inclusive, it's because growing up, I didn't have this sexy environment that a lot of people think about, oh, you have all those faraway land, you know, jeans, and it's so sexy, and so kind of iconic. Whoa, that sounds that way. But in reality is not because I was never accepted here or here. So I am important story. And that's part of the conversation that we had a few weeks ago behind the scenes. So that's one of the reasons why I'm like, Okay, I need to fix myself. And dealing with family was not the key. Going into substance abuse was not the key getting hooked to pharmaceutical products was not the key, and much less. Getting experimental with drugs was not the answer for me either. So I went on a personal quest to see what it's up there, that is going to become the solution to my troubles. And I found it, and that floral therapy, neuroscience, Japanese philosophy and humanistic Buddhism. So I'm very passionate about it, because I see it all the time, all the struggles and the things that people aren't talking about, because they are not even aware that exist. I have been a guest in a multiple number of podcasts in the past few months. And what I have to say to the world, I am not joking, and I'm not bragging, it's mic drop, every time that I say my point of view to a podcast host. They're like, Whoa, I didn't see it coming. I never thought about that way. Nobody say anything like that before. So I'm being very unapologetic about it. And I just took a very deep breath and said, Okay, here we come. What do people see out in the world in current time, this is my version of me. And I'm going to rent out the dirty laundry, because there's no other way how to fix your emotional issue. If you don't make to peace, to dos issues, you are never going to be successful, you are never going to find inner peace. So you have to come to that moment where you dissect all the chain of events, and say, Okay, this is what got me here. And this is how I detach myself from those bitter experiences. And this is how I can bring value to the world. And after the whole virus apocalypse, I just noticed even more pronounced that we are all sinking into some sort of mental issue, some sort of emotional challenge, but nobody talks about because we're too good for that. Or the stigma that if you ask for help, or if you confess that you are depressed, then there's something wrong with you. Let me tell you, I spent most of my years depressed, chronically depressed, and it was nothing to do with me. It was all environmental. My parents, my family Being an unwanted child coming from a culture that is very much a center, a colonial mentality, I can write books about it. There's nothing wrong with me. So now that I clear out the landscape, and I can plant the seeds, that makes me happy, everything in my life is blooming everything. So love it now you can carry on with the conversation.

Keith McKeever 15:26

No, I love that. I think you're not alone in this either. I mean, I think there's a lot of people that have that middle ground perspective, you know, that maybe they need to sit back and realize that they've got something, whatever, whatever it is, maybe it's religion, race, culture, whatever, calling it them on opposite ends, that they have a unique opportunity to sit there and look at things from the middle ground, and see those kinds of things. And one thing I hope I wish for everybody is they could just figure out who they are, and be unapologetically themselves as a journey, though, to get to that point. It's very, out there, you know, I mean, like, I'm, I'm working on it, but I do love the just just putting it out there and, you know, the boldness and all that stuff. I love it. I I think some people need to hear the hard to hard to hear things. And you know, you can look at it beyond that, too, like anything is divided, where you kind of pull in one direction or another, you know, you just you see different things from different perspectives. I don't, I don't get into politics in here. Politically, I'm very middle of the road. Let's put it that way. And I see things on both sides that I'm like, Oh, like this, but I don't like this. Like, this is ridiculous both ways. You know what I mean? Like, there's just a lot of ridiculousness. But, you know, it's an interesting place to be where you get a little bit more perspective, where if you're, on one side, you don't get to other people's perspectives. But you don't get you don't get the education and learn about things unless you talk to other people of other cultures and other experiences, which is the beauty of thanks to. So I appreciate you sharing that. One of the first things I wanted to talk to you about was kind of along those lines of creating a Zen environment. So what is Zen and what? What is creating a Zen environment, your life look like? I'm assuming you're not taking this from like a physical inside the room space.

Nefertiti 17:32

No, it's a composite of different layers. Because then it starts from you, within you and then outside. But at the same time, he's a very fine dance, he said delicate dance, because they are connected and intertwined. And because they are so intertwined, it can get very challenging to clear out the clutter, and to get center. And many times you come to that situation of being a chicken or egg type of scenario. Like which way do they go. And of course, it's not cookie quarter, or a cooking book recipe type of thing. And it's a very personal journey. And so in my case, I had a level of success until the virus Apocalypse hits. But I had a lot of issues that I kept in the basement in the attic, underneath the bed in the class, and I was BC, I was rocking my style, and I was being followed. But the moment that the rug got pulled from under me that I can now perform, I can go be social, I can go go to the bar, I can go to performances, then I am forced to be within four walls. And that's when the depression got even more chronic and deeper. I was having insomnia every night. I was a stressed out depressed, I was randomly having these mild pine pain, anxiety attacks. And it was just awful. Until one morning like around 3am I say enough of this. I don't know how I don't know when I don't know what's the answer yet. But I need to become the solution to my own troubles. And I went on a quest. So by filtering and curating the environment out of pure necessity. I started finding out more about myself. Neuroscience was a very key component because I have to do the inner work, but he was facilitated In a very scientific way, that I can do it myself, I don't have to rely on a therapist, I don't have to rely on a shrink. Because that codependency it was just terrifying to me, I didn't want to go that way. I have trust issues for a number of reasons. And I'd rather keep a self contained. And within my resources, this is not for everybody, because there's times that yes, he's legit, you need medication, I am not a doctor. And that's not my call. But I'm talking from my personal experience, how things went down and what he pulled out of it. So stand environment, it's having the adequate space for you to allocate time for contemplative moments. And she re what's coming? What kind of information how do you carry yourself out to the world? Because again, it's a very delicate dance. He's just like Congo, you know, one move that way. The other one follow? It's very interesting.

Keith McKeever 21:06

How much of a dancer

Nefertiti 21:10

Yeah, you are not aware of it. But oh, conversation, you know, you can think about it. And you're gonna be like, Yeah, I am not only creative, but I'm dancing too. And just realize,

Keith McKeever 21:22

no, talk to my wife. She's telling you, I'm not a dancer.

Nefertiti 21:27

So I, you started by clean cleaning things that I noticed that it will trigger my mind. So you have to start with awareness. That's the key part. Sometimes you are like agitated and you don't know why. Well look around. Pay attention to what do you notice and what he tells they're getting you bent out of shape.

Keith McKeever 21:54

So it could be anything in your environment, like your dresser is cluttered, or there's dishes in the sink or you don't like the color of the paint on the walls, and you're like, you know, gosh, I really hated that blue blueish grey for a long time, and I need to paint it. You know, I feel I just feel a little bit better inside by doing it. That yeah, okay.

Nefertiti 22:13

Yeah. Yeah, that is a good way to start. And also be mindful about what makes you happy. When I started this whole neuroscience endeavor, they get guy who was training me and we still connected, I am not going anywhere. I mean, he has to die for me to just like, drop the program, because he had been so important to me and my well being. And one of the things that he say, and I was like, Ooh, how do I do that? You just didn't quite register. But it was this beautiful phrase, do more of what you love, less of what you tolerate? A known of what you hate.

Keith McKeever 22:57

I've heard that before.

Nefertiti 22:59

So the moment that you start applying that into your life, even if it's just one effect, okay, what makes me happy gardening, allocate the time for garden. What makes me happy, well, go for somebody allocated time for that. What makes me happy dancing, okay, make it happen. Don't leave it up there floating in the ether that I would like, but I can't because you are depriving yourself from pleasures in life, that each going to trickle down into mental issues. And again, nobody talks about that. Anything that you are suppressing or repressing and not being proactive in communicating that you are just soaking it up. That's going to evolve into some serious mental health issues.

Keith McKeever 23:57

I think that's where we find problems. Specifically, with this podcast, being about the military, veteran community, we have this problem of being caught in the military mindset, that macho mindset of like, we're strong. You know, we I'm strong and the guys and gals, to my left and the right are strong, we're strong, we're supposed to be you know, carrying the weight of the world on our shoulders and not showing any signs of weakness and by going to mental health or discussing these things or thinking about it, it's perceived as weakness.

Nefertiti 24:30

It's a taboo. Nobody wants to take the uncomfortable conversation. I get it and that's the reason what I'm taking it upon myself because nobody else is doing it. Okay. Me being the performer, okay, I am not that shy being out in the public. So I'm going to make my notes in the world and I'm going to shake few trees. And earlier this year, I got requested to be part of few books. And that really shaped me from the inside out and once you put something on writing and you went out you dirty laundry, it's a little bit of uncomfortable decision to make. But once you make it is so relieving, because you are making peace with yourself and you feel like you are getting justice being delivered. Because there are certain situations that they are not going to get fixed, the person who did the wrongdoing upon you is not going to ever even acknowledge that he did those things to you. And then you are eating your heart out. Oh, you know, this person is just treating me like a crazy individual. Well, that's their business, just make your own peace with yourself, and what is going to make you a better person at whatever capacity that is. So I started doing community work, I got more involved into neuroscience, art as therapy, getting out there my point of view, and now my craft is taking off, it's getting international recognition, I have the books with my name associated to it. And again, everything is blooming. But if I didn't take them comfortable action taking off, okay, I'm gonna put myself out there. And I'm going to dig into all the pain, there's nothing sexy about that. I cry a lot. I cry the Amazon River and the Nile River in the process. But it was totally worth it. And

Keith McKeever 26:29

turn it off. It's been off for a long time, it's gonna stay, right. It's gonna sting for a while. I mean, I've been through this, myself with some of my issues, like, you know, I had blinders on for years, but I had any problems or issues and everything was just fine and peachy in the world. But, you know, then I, you know, I hit a certain point where I had that, that moment where I decided to do something, and nobody else was going to do it for you. You have to have the mental awareness and recognition that you have to do it. It's like, it's like trying to quit smoking, right? You can go cold turkey, or you can wear the patch, or they probably have a pill, I don't know, right. But it's on you to actually not pick up a cigarette and light it up. Right, right. Like you either do it yourself or you get a little bit of assistance, the the patch would be the same thing as a mental health provider, they can help you walk through it to help you make sense of things help guide you through it. But the work is on you. Yeah, one has to work through it all.

Nefertiti 27:27

Well, you just said we're the work is on you. And that's also one of the issues that I see here in America. Because in a country with so many resources and technology, everything has to be instant satisfaction. Nobody wants to do the work. So it's easier to go to the therapist and think that you're good. But you're not, it's easier to get into the substance abuse or the pill. Because everybody or the majority of them want instant gratification instant resolution, and it just doesn't work out that way.

Keith McKeever 28:08

You just you could study anybody who's been successful, whatever, could be business could be life could become overcoming substance abuse, whatever. They're all telling you the same thing. It was hard work for a very long period of time. And he had to focus a lot of energy on overcoming that. Or pushing through. And not just giving it there's no magic pill, there's no Hey, take your red. You see on Facebook every now and then. Right? Like, would you have the red pill that does this? Or the blue pill? Does that?

Nefertiti 28:37

Right, I get a Gela

Keith McKeever 28:39

right now knows, is there. Is there a mix there somewhere and you know, there's no, there's an easy button for all that stuff. You just You just got to work through it. As painful as it is, or it's however long it's gonna take, you got to do it. You got to put in the work.

Nefertiti 28:56

Yes, but also its own in the way that you frame things. Because when you say it's hard work, you're already making it hard on yourself. From the neuroscience perspective, your brain, it's absorbing everything in words that comes in as information, whether it is real or not. And that's one of the reasons what I'm very adamant about curating my environment, what I listened to, and even the way people talk when I'm around, and I have been avoiding certain people because I hear the negativity coming and the intensity that is coming in. I'm like, I don't want my brain to absorb that. I'm good. I don't have a TV. I don't pay for cable. I run away from politics. I curate the kind of music that I hear in the radio stations. And if I hear for example, like some of those rap songs that everything is to screw the world girls in the world owes me and you know, I'm oppressed. But no, I'm good. I am not listening to that. Because the more you allow those words to be floating in your brain, the more sinks in and the more you own it. So I keep myself in a bubble. Totally in a bubble. Everything is art, everything is blooming, everything is beautiful. And I made a declaration earlier this year. And I got invited to be part of one book. And my content for the book was I no longer settle for average, that was my thing. My approach is either wicked awesome. blooming, or it's a masterpiece. Those are the three options for me to reply to something.

Keith McKeever 30:55

When you reframe the narrative,

Nefertiti 30:58

yes, so when I hear people say, No, it's not too bad, not to Xiaomi Same old, same old and I'm like, Ooh, no, you gotta go. I don't need that kind of replies. That's not the way that I carry on with my life. So that's just few of the mental hacks that have been total success. For me, I see the difference. And also, I have been contemplating life lately. One thing that I do at the end of the year is that I look back to that particular calendar. And I do an inventory of all the successes, the accomplishments, the things that make me happy. And then I rehearse all those at the end of the year. And it might sound like magic or coincidence. So we're, but there have been a good number of things in my life, that it started as a joke, or just like an idea, cray see out there floating in the ether, and have become a very tangible reality in my world. So I am very careful with the words now that I peek even how I joke about it, or how I allow people to address me. And if you allow somebody to, you know, call you names on there, the banner that we're joking, I have a lot to say about that. It's passive aggressive, passive aggressive, it's a form of abuse, you are sabotaging your own success. Because by you know, setting the tone, you are accepting that in your subconscious and you own it. So people need to stop the madness. And when I go to, for example, an event and I may need somebody and perhaps because I am happily single, there's a hint that it could be a potential date. I'm like scanning out, okay, how many drama eats involve

Keith McKeever 33:06

the hairs on the back of the neck like something's off here?

Nefertiti 33:09

Yeah, so I am paying attention to all those things. Because the moment that you welcome somebody in your life, you are going to get a splash with that energy. Whether it's success, drama, passive, aggressive behavior, inconsistency, you name it, that's going to be a splash in you. So I'm very particular when it comes to the people in my environment, not only the quality of the people, but also the environment itself. Like my place is a little messy now, because I have a BCC son, but I have art, I have flowers. I have things that I look at it and it makes me smile, it is intentional, because I already know how to program my brain, to smile, to be happy to be appreciative of those things. So those are more additional tricks and hacks, how to improve your mental health and your inner peace and happiness.

Keith McKeever 34:11

So that's some awesome stuff. And we kind of we talked about a little bit of this a few weeks ago when we taught and I think I may have mentioned it that there's a there's a real estate coach that I've that I follow. When in real estate that I'm talking about. His name is Tom Ferry, he wrote a book many years ago called life by design or live your life by design, something like that. I'll be honest, I didn't read all the way through it. I read enough into it for it to have an impact on me to be like, You know what? There are certain things that you can do that you have control over and certain things you have zero control over. I think part of being a veteran kind of helped that in some ways. Like, like you mentioned news. I'm gonna say what I don't watch the news. I don't care what the 10 people on theirs opinions are about whatever's happening in the world. What I want is facts. That's all I will read. I'll pull up a news website once Today, just to get a general idea, and all I do is usually read just the headlines, what's going on? That's all I want to know, what what is the basics of what's going on in this world. I don't want everybody else's commentary opinions on it for my own. But like different. Yeah, just just one example of one thing that I've done is very in line with what you're saying, you know, I definitely have some few things in my office that would help with the Senate Environment in here. But there's, there's a lot that people can do, to kind of to kind of set that

Nefertiti 35:37

whether then there's no top dollars involved, you can do it at a very low cost, if any, sometimes just by tweaking certain things, and arranging in a certain fashion, and you're good to go. There's no need to have these mindset that, oh, I don't have the money for it, or that's too expensive, or I don't have the time, they're just little things, increments of improvement that you can do over time that your future self is going to thank you later. Yeah, they should be considered.

Keith McKeever 36:14

I mean, I couldn't say you're in honestly a bit. One of my issues. For myself, that just kind of bugs me is I have paper notes for everything I jot stuff down or else I won't remember it. But occasionally, I need to go in and put them into the computer somehow, so that I have them long term. And I don't need these little scribble handouts, right? Because it bothers me to have all this paper on the desk that I never flipped through. And it's not searchable. It bugs me, right? Because it's on my desk. That's one of those things that like, for me personally, that I have to work through, like get this stuff off of here and be more clean and clear, clutter free, right? Because I see it every day. And I'm like, Okay, I really should, you know, kind of dive into that right? Start start working towards fixing it up a little bit. So like, it could be little things like you said, like, it could be transcribing notes online or a couple of bucks for a can of paint, paint a wall, rearranging some furniture, change the layout. I mean, there's a lot of things I think you could do if you if somebody sits in reflects on it says what would be better on here? You know, I know my wife would say probably if the kids would actually do the dishes, you know, that would be nice. That would help everybody. There's something I guess is my point for everybody and every everybody's living situation that they can improve.

Nefertiti 37:32

Right? But there are a few kind of hacks and tricks that you can do. For example, you mentioned the notes all over the place. So you box you but they're there, and they're not going away. Maybe I located just five minutes, 10 minutes, and you look at the pile. And you said okay, everything because this is very important. In the euroscience is not about the intensity, it's about the consistency. So you don't have to go full blast in one day to fix it all. Because that, did you do? I'm sorry. Oh, did you do anything? Can we pause for a second?

Keith McKeever 38:20

Yeah, go ahead. Just go ahead. mute yourself,

Keith McKeever 38:22

okay. Here we go. So yeah, there's a lot of things that people can do, I'll just continue all of this, and just just some ideas that I'll toss out a brainstorm that are relatively small. And I hope she can hear me and give her two points on this here in a second. But, you know, one thing that you could probably do for your environment is just examine where, where you're at on a regular basis, you know, if you want to think about in terms of your physical environment, where do you spend all your time, right? Hopefully, you spend eight hours a day sleeping in your bedroom, but your bedroom, your living room, your kitchen, your bathrooms, you know, maybe your home office, maybe your office, wherever you work, right? And just start breaking those down, stand in the middle of the room and look around and say what needs to change in here? How can I change this up? What am I going to do to like take this to the next level and make the changes that I need to make. It could be just about anything that you could do in those those kind of environments. So just sit in the middle of the room and look around see what kind of change I don't know if you heard that or not. Yes, yes. Okay. I was thoughts on that by taking you know, room by room environment, my environment when it comes to the physical stuff. Yeah.

Nefertiti 39:46

Even that it's a little bit ambitious. You should go by a corner, because everybody's to be seen. So you just pick a shelf, or pick a little section. Sure, because otherwise it's not gonna get done, your brain is gonna be like, Oh my God, that's too much work, it hurts, I don't want to think I got a fleet. So you have to enter again. That's the reason what I say the consistency now the intensity. So

Keith McKeever 40:17

like 10 minutes every day and say I'm gonna start with this room. And no matter how many days it takes you to start with this corner, this shelf, this thing, whatever, maybe the floor may be cleaned out what's under your bed, whatever. And then when you're done, and you sit there a week later say, Wow, everyday, this week, I attacked something in this room, and it's now all done. And yes, that's one.

Nefertiti 40:38

And there are a few things to be added in that department number one by the consistency, your brain is going to get trained. So then he doesn't have to think about it. And he takes at least 100 days for behavioral pattern to be established. Otherwise, you're gonna have the inner dialogue of your brain resistant to it. Because one of the things about our anatomy is that going to run on conservation of energy. So if I have to think too much, you want to avoid that. But if you start later bet a little bit a little bit, then your brain is like, okay, here we go the little bit again, I don't want to think about it. So it becomes a behavioral positive for the positive. So you look at the math. And you say, Okay, I'm going to concentrate on magazines, and clean out all the magazines, or I'm going to go from the top of the pile, few papers, whatever they can clear out within seven minutes or five minutes. Because the moment that you pass the 15 minute mark, then you are like, that's too much. I don't have time for that. So you have to be your own tricks there. Have your own mind when you're starting new endeavors. That's very important.

Keith McKeever 42:05

That's brilliant, because I mean, everybody can squeeze 15 minutes into their schedule somewhere. I mean, I would imagine almost everybody can squeeze 15 minutes of their day consistently, to do something.

Nefertiti 42:16

And also, the other thing is the ethical bribing. That's key. And don't go for oh, I'm going to have cookies. No, no, no, you don't want to go that way. Ethical bribing in the stands. So for example, there are some, let's say, a concert that you want to go away and if a week, and that's going to be your reward for the five, seven minutes that you are doing every day. And then you are going to give yourself a reward for staying on track. So you get that extra burst of dopamine, like, Yeah, I'm accomplish, you know, I need to five minutes every day of the week, and I'm going to treat myself to go to that concert. Or I'm going to take myself to drive along the shoreline, whatever, they still learn a perk that is going to do a for you that it's going to make you happy. So the consistency on a small increment, that's very important. I'm making it a regular practice, and the reward, but no getting to I'm going to have a bottle of wine or you know, I'm going to get the Vasa cookies, because then you are creating a very negative behavior that you are going to regret later. So you have to be again, very mindful about how you play those tricks with your brain.

Keith McKeever 43:45

Awesome. So anybody going through this, you know, they're setting behaviors, they're doing positive things, trying to get their environment. But stress is one of those things that just comes up. It just happens. So if somebody's finding themselves stressed, what has worked for you to, to just kind of slack yourself and be like, Hey, wake up, I'm stressed. I need to lower the stress level and get back to you know, optimal performance.

Nefertiti 44:13

Oh, I have to say so much about the stress because I was chronically stressed for a while.

Keith McKeever 44:23

So you have to start by a stress it's the knowledge of you are out of capacity. So you have to step back and look around, be mindful and be aware.

Nefertiti 44:41

At what level or what is making you feel that you are out of capacity. Is it time related? You see relationship that is stressing you out? Is it the boss? Is it the traffic, what is and then the things that you can do you two meet together. One very important for me is to have a way of self expression. And I call it my holy grail. The Holy Grail is again, that mix of neuroscience with a cabana, which is the equal of floral therapy. If I need to process something, I go to a cabana. If I need to be creative, I go to a cabana. If I need to contemplate and make important decisions, I'm going to get myself that center of you no gravity for a moment, pause, contemplate before they jump into it. So their way of self expression is very important. Also, what makes you happy, because it's not a cookie cutter. And quick tricks, if you can do that, you're gonna see like their results immediately. One is breathing. So do breathing. And I usually do count of three or five going in. Then I pause for like a count of three or five depending on like how much of a rush I am. And then exhale out very slowly in accounted for about seven. So when I do the breathe in, you say I'm breathing calmness or breathing certainty. And you pick the word that is going to do it for you. So at some point, I was okay, I'm breathing in calmness. I am excelling chaos, because I was feeling in total chaos. So that was the, the choice of words. And you don't have to do that too, too long, you don't have to go on a coke on a conquering quest of, oh, I'm going to be a sang meditation master. Now if you just do that minute and a half, two minutes. So the breathing is very important because you can only pay attention to one thing. So when you do the breathing, it doesn't matter the stress, it doesn't matter how crappy you feel to somebody, anything you are counting

Nefertiti 47:20

your brain cannot concentrate on anything else. But that count of breathing. That right there automatically is going to interrupt the pattern of you being stressed out or being fuming because something happened. Then the other thing that you can do, it has is to have something handy that it's going to trigger your mind to placing memories. And it can be you know, a necklace or something that you look at the wall, or something that you might be hiding on the dollar. So you just go for that trigger in your mind that is going to reset you. The other thing and this is gonna sound kind of funky. But just shake, like just shake it. And if you see, like the dogs and the cat, when they like randomly shake like crazy, that that's the nervous system, kind of resetting, any The same applies for humans. So by the fact that you just like shake it off, again, interrupts a partner, it's very easy to do, you can do it in the bathroom, you can do it, you know, behind the door before you go into an office. You don't need to be a master on the topic. And you don't have to spend a lot of time or money. Those are like super quick ways that you can do it on the fly.

Keith McKeever 48:52

Like the second one, I mean, because you can do it anything I say you can sit at your desk and you're just you're tired of looking at what you're looking at, right you know, you need you need stressing out, frustrated, whatever, just get up and move just, you know, stretch your arms, do some stretches, like you said, shake it out, like do some pacing back and forth kind of work up the heart rate, snap your attention off, what are you thinking about microphone all over the place, but just just that movement to snap you out of whatever that is, like I'll do that in my office. If I get really tired of working on the task, I'll just be like, Alright, put it on pause. And I will I'll go to my family room and I'll walk around a little bit. We're all gonna do some laundry or go upstairs, talk to my wife for a little bit. We both work out of the home, but you know, just that that break. So you know, you're just kind of re snapping. You're on that path.

Nefertiti 49:45

Yeah, also a couple other things that you can add to the mix to your repertoire of tricks and hacks. You can just step out to the fresh air. Look up to the sky just for Few seconds, and just that movement of looking up and smile is gonna reset you. It just does wonders. And then the other thing is to have eye space where you can just like sit and relax for a few moments and it doesn't have to be extended period of time. Having a floating arrangement is very beneficial, because you have the water in your mind immediately goes to the tranquility of having a shallow water surface. Because that has to do with the biophilic art. And that's something that we as humans are connected to nature. And sometimes we do ourselves a lot of harm with all these technology in being in the speed of light internet connection and multitasking, you are overloading your brain. So you just have to let it go for a few seconds look a body of water, light some incense and just allow that to kind of take over the environment and reset. Because we have this wrong image that Oh, you have to try harder. And you have to go longer and you have to do a marathon and you have to prove and you have to multitask. I have no idea how they came about. But it's totally wrong. Because the more you overdo it yourself, the less productive you're gonna be each proven.

Keith McKeever 51:43

Oh, yeah, absolutely. I thought you know, the only outside thing you were just gonna mention just going outside. I mean, I know you're on the East Coast. I'm here in the Midwest. You know the summery golf side, you can get hit with a heatwave and humidity. In the winter, you can go outside and just freeze your butt off for 30 seconds and that'll snap you right back into a different mindset. Right.

Nefertiti 52:02

And that's gonna make you feel quite alive.

Keith McKeever 52:05

Both of them well, that's, that's for sure. So you mentioned told you was gonna mess up it Kay banya cabana? Okay, cabana. So that's a floral flower arrangement. So explain a little bit of what that is and what that art form is.

Nefertiti 52:23

He Kibana is the soothing and contemplative art of floral design, created in Japan. It came originally from China. And it was mostly practice at the beginning of the art form as a devotion art. So it was practiced by the high priest in the shrines and temples. And he was to decorate the space where Buddha statues were displayed. And from that evolve into more than elite and the imperial family, it was a very exclusive art. Then he kind of went down a little bit in the different classes and became part of the samurai lifestyle, because it's a contemplative art. So when you are not out for battle, how do you keep your mind sharp for the decision making and having your intuition on point in having creativity fully strategic planning on point, II Kibana is a good tool for that. Now, in current times, it's a little bit misconcept, in the sense of some people might think of it as a superfluous art or flowers, that vanity or something of luxury or necessary, but essential, good, sustainable way. How to keep your skin environment have a way of self expression, and also how to be in tune with the nature. And it's very sustainable. It's not all that luxurious, like some people have the wrong image of it. I can do Ikebana anywhere, anywhere, anytime. With branches, and unwanted you know, use glassware from the kitchen. So you don't have to go into 1000s of dollars paying for that expensive program like I have done. You can do it out of nothing is very eco friendly. You can recycle, you can upgrade you can repurpose, and that's one of the reasons why I'm so passionate about it. And one of the things that have been getting me sort of international attention is that some people talk about for example, rescuing pets, you Well, everybody has a different passion, I go and rescue that flower. And with the death flowers, I do sculpture. And it's something that not too many people are doing. And because I intertwine the neuroscience with the Japanese philosophy and the humanistic Buddhism, it makes it more unique. So I'm very passionate about sharing that with other people. And, again, it's something that you can do at anytime, anywhere with zero resources. I have done pieces, just water, glass, it can be dollar store, it can be from the kitchen, one of those mixing bowls, and dandelion floating. And a lot of people hate dandelions, and they are looking at it like, Oh, those unwanted weeds. But you can do tea with those too. And it's very medicinal too. So it shows how you can see the positive and the possibilities to use different things within a given context.

Keith McKeever 56:06

I think that's what I like about it is it's, it's art, there's tons of different art you can do out there, right? It doesn't have to be this you could focus on music, or art or something else. The beauty is an eye of whoever's looking at it, you could create something beautiful, or you could just create something, either way, the real power is in your presence while doing it. And what it does for you, when you're, you know, in the right mindset, and you're you're thinking you're contemplating, whether that's what your next move in life is or just cutting something out of your mind and just focusing, there's so many different benefits, I think that's what's really powerful. And if somebody like I jokingly say, I'm not artistic, I really get very interested in art as a therapy. Like I really I'm very, very interested in I mean, because you could do anything, you can do it Kibana, you could do pottery, you could paint, you could sculpt things out of metal and welded together, you could find scrap wood and build something out of it. It didn't matter. You can take old articles of clothes and repurpose them. I mean, there's all kinds of things go to an art museum, and you'll see exactly what I'm talking about. Right? Oh, all kinds of stuff.

Nefertiti 57:23

Now, you mentioned that you want to be coming to Boston to visit, I have to take you I never have this yet.

Nefertiti 57:31

Excuse me, oh my god. Allergy said this time of the year tells me oh, there's such a thing called a Museum of Bad Art. There.

Keith McKeever 57:48

Oh, that ought to be interesting.

Nefertiti 57:51

So I might save the visit for when you come over, and we go together.

Keith McKeever 57:56

So you're telling me I can start creating some really bad art and get famous for

Nefertiti 58:01

you see, nothing is off the table. That's my chance.

Keith McKeever 58:06

I appreciate that. And especially anybody else out there, don't steal my idea. Don't take money out of my pocket. I got better to create. That's really cool. That's got to be very interesting.

Nefertiti 58:19

Oh, that has to be hilarious. I know that he's a thing. But I have never invested that in actually, he's not too far from my neighborhood either.

Keith McKeever 58:26

The funny thing is what makes bad art.

Nefertiti 58:30

We have to assess that.

Keith McKeever 58:32

Because when I go to I mean, I've I was not into art at all until I was in college a few years ago, I took an art history class started thinking about a little bit more. Like I said, I mean, I jokingly say that I'm not artistic. But when I look at the famous paintings and sculpture, sculpture, sculptures, I'm like, wow, the time the energy, the focus that it took to make those the technique for the different brush stroke techniques, or, or the dot type paintings, you know, I really appreciate the skill that it took for those artists to create those paintings. And so I've changed my philosophy on artwork, because a couple of years ago, I would have been like, who cares about art, I honestly would have been taking that class maybe appreciated a lot more and appreciate the skill that it took. And I think what's interesting now is I see that okay, not only it takes skill, but it has all these other positive attributes to it. Yeah. Which which is awesome. Just imagine, think about how much how much time some of the famous famous artists of yesteryear had on their hands, you know, painting the Sistine Chapel and other things source fiddling. They had a lot of time by themselves to think.

Nefertiti 59:48

Well, I not only that, but if you look, for example, that Gothic architecture, the Sagrada Familia in Spain is still under construction. Anyhow been over 100 years. I You're still at it. So to create masterpieces, yeah, I've said a lifetime process

Keith McKeever 1:00:05

that goes back to that consistency, right? You know, dedication day, and, and work at it a little bit more almost still some I'm still some words from the late friend of mine, when you wake up every day, and you ask yourself, What am I going to do today? You just get up and do it. A late friend of mine, you said all the time, it's just like that just wake up today. What am I going to do today? Go do it and be consistent. Like, that's all there is to it. Rome was the day, right?

Nefertiti 1:00:37

Well, no, he was not neither the world and imagine that, you know, it takes seven days for the Creator to get it done. So what is left for us? Take your time. Don't rush it. It's not gonna be Eastern satisfaction.

Keith McKeever 1:00:53

Exactly. I couldn't agree more.

Nefertiti 1:00:57

And, you know, back to the caveman, I have to put it out there because you mentioned and I know for a fact two guys in law enforcement and the military, they can be you know, very, like Macha, Tov, I don't wear collars, and I don't do CC things and screw the world, you know, pure power. Few things. It's scientifically proven that it's not conducive, and you aren't gonna get don't stop out of pure willpower 24/7 You're gonna burn yourself out. That's one. The other one is that he kevanna. It's an art that he had been practiced for centuries by military strategist. And to kind of confirm that, in current times, one of my favorites, it carries practitioners. It's a guy retire from the army, from Norway. And he's so talented, he repurpose things, he come up with his own containers for the flower designs from like air filters, and scrap metal, it's just such a delight to see his creativity working. So this is not just like, oh, superfluous, cc girly things, flowers. That's not optimized standard, it should be consider, because it makes you more in tune. And you can find a lot of on here and a lot of hidden talent that you didn't know that you even have, because you start recycling, looking at possibilities, looking at ways how to address, you know, like issues of design, usage of resources, and it really makes you a better person, because how you do one thing is that how you do everything else. And there's no limits or restrictions. And that's something that I love. And on the program from the school that I'm attending, they are more than 100 prompts for you to do a design. Which means that there's no place on cover in your environment. Like for example, use dry materials, fresh materials, only branches only flowers only. For example, the color of the container is going to be the focus point, the view from above the view from below. So by you putting yourself in that moment that okay, what can I work that is going to match the space? Or a How can I use the Korean resources without me having to spend money to cover that space, or to entertain somebody or to enhance the table for dinner tonight. So it brings your level of awareness in your capacity to think fast, in a very unique perspective, that it gives you a very strong advantage comparison with the rest of the world.

Keith McKeever 1:04:29

We'll see how that would have a crossover impact if you will, into other parts of your life. Right? We're unfortunately, as a society, around the world, for the most part, we're a thrown away by new kind of system, if you will, ya know, all the stuff that goes into the landfills, all these different things you could create art out of or things that you'd maybe throw away at your house. Maybe something like that. You could say you know, maybe I don't need to throw that container out. I can do something else with it. Maybe it's not artwork. But oh, this could be a storage container for this or could storage container for that, or I can repurpose this for this or there's useful parts out of, you know, five different things I could throw away for and condense all the working parts into one, you know, whatever. We've gotten to that point where that resourcefulness is kind of gone in our society. You know, I've been in a lot of homes of people who are that generation, the greatest generation will were to every generation who grew up in the Great Depression. And I can tell you one common thing that I find that a lot of those homes because those older guys were resourceful as heck, baby food jars, your any kind of glass jars, scroll to the bottom of the shelf, twist and put it in there. And this one's got this type of screw, and that one's got that kind of nail in it. And pencil sharpener is everywhere. And like, I've been in so many of those houses where there's this little mini workshop in the basement, those guys reused everything, nothing is thrown away, Oh, that little scrap piece of wood, okay, fine. I can either build something out of it, or I can burn it in the fireplace, or, you know, we got away from that wherever things disposable this disposable that, you know, so if you stop and take a look at what's around you what you can reuse, do you need really need to throw it away? Or can you? Is it useful still perform?

Nefertiti 1:06:20

Well, and on that note, I have to tell you that there is a concept in Japanese philosophy, and it's called My Tony. And that translates to not being wasteful of your resources. Be mindful about what's available within your landscape. But also, it's a very fine line between being mindful of your resources and being bored or like cheap.

Keith McKeever 1:06:53

Yeah, absolutely.

Nefertiti 1:06:55

So I always make the clarification in there. Because there's nothing sexy about being cheap. I don't want somebody arguing about $1 item or you know, the drain cat, the restaurant, there's nothing sexy about that.

Keith McKeever 1:07:11

It's okay to be frugal. It's not okay to be cheap. Well, you will spend the money on things that are necessary to spend good money on a cheap person will just spend the cheapest dollar amount on anything and everything in their lives.

Nefertiti 1:07:26

Right. So by you being mindful about their resources, then it you can, you know, allocate extra time or money or expending funds for other things. But also, it makes us sustainable and eco friendly for the environment, which I'm very passionate about.

Keith McKeever 1:07:49

Yeah, definitely a lot of crossovers and things to take away there. But I wanted to go back to what you said about kind of the macho attitude of military law enforcement stuff. I think, working with art, no matter what type it is, can provide. There's no perfect balance to this. But if you're in a high stress career, like military, law enforcement, paramedics, doctors, nurses, maybe even teachers, any one of those really super high stress, high, high performance type industries, you probably need more a lot of balance. And that is a good way to bring maybe your life and stress levels a little bit more in balance, may not perfectly in balance, right? There's no that balance is different for everybody what everybody needs. But I think that there's a lot of power in that being able to do something for people like that.

Nefertiti 1:08:45

Well, I'm gonna bring you another my dropping moment. Because I'm the queen of that. When people avoid self care, they are mastering negligence to themselves. And that's something that nobody talks about. You have to put other first you have to be responsible. You have to be the grown up, behave like an adult. Play your role, all these different things. And the more you brainwash yourself with that mentality, the more likely you're going to get sick, you're going to have male mental issues, you're gonna get depressed, you're going to be cranky, because you are neglecting yourself from the basic right to do something that makes you happy and it makes you a better person. So I so I started these years campaigning for do not master negligence and people are like, Why? Yes, like you Herod do know master negligence. Because, for example, when you are In a toxic situation, and I'm a total senior on that one, I own it, I'm going to be very clear and sincere about it. The times that I wanted to keep peace in the Middle East, and I was the one absorbing the weight of things not being resolved, I was being negligent to myself, because I was the one overloading my brain, thinking about what was not conducive for me how the other person was taking advantage of me how the situation was not favorable for me, and the world carries on spinning around the RV. So I was being negligent to myself by not taking the uncomfortable conversation, or taking the uncomfortable decision making. And that's something that majority of us get conditioned to take that route. So if I can make people think about it, and ponder about it, I'm gonna feel quite accomplished. So whatever you chose to do after these virtual time together, if there's one single thing that I want you to take home and ponder about, it's negligence. Are you being negligent to yourself?

Keith McKeever 1:11:17

I venture to say, a lot of people, if they're honest with themselves, would say, Yes, I know, I've been there. I did that a couple of years ago, you know, I was, I was super stressed a lot of things going on. And I had this awakening moment, if you will, of like, I've got all this stuff going on in my life. And I'm trying to do things, you know, I mean, I've got these goals in life, right? I'm trying to do, on my path, do certain things, live my life by my design, but also at the same time I was, I was kind of doing the same thing, right? I was neglecting myself, I wasn't taking care of myself in the way I wanted to one of those things was what was I allowing negative to come into my life? What was what kind of things was I doing that were bringing me joy, I won't say what it was. But there was something that I was involved in that was like, Look, that no longer brought me joy. It no longer served a purpose. I enjoyed it for a while. But every time I thought about it, or had to do anything for it, it just annoyed the heck out of me, it would bring me so down and I was like, I gotta be done. 100% gotta be done. Cut that out of my life, get it out of here, put it in the rearview mirror. And don't let that influence my life anymore. That's just one thing, you know, that cutting out one thing made a huge impact. All that extra time I got back the energy, the mental focus, I didn't have to get so angry and upset about things anymore. You know. So anyway, I think there's a there's a lot to that. But he definitely gave us a good, a darn good blueprint, and things to think about. And control your environment and cut out those things. I mean, all kinds of different things. So but last thing I want to do here is I want to point out ahead of scrolling for a few minutes, have no fear. If you're listening, it's in the show notes. At me a fusion.com Is your website, tell us what kind of things we can find there on your website.

Nefertiti 1:13:11

Yeah, so my website needs to be updated. But you can get a glance of the different things that I have been doing in the performing arts, I am transitioning to more on the approach of mental wellness and therapeutic art, just because that's what lights me up. And I've seen that I can do better service with my brilliance in that department for the community and the people out there. Because I see the results in my own life. But anyways, we can connect this a little bit of information about my bio, what I do what I'm passionate about some of the highlights of things that I have done in the past few years with my company and the fusion, which originally started as a performing our company, and then evolved into educational programs and then into a to a beauty arts and public engagements and public speaking

Keith McKeever 1:14:09

is another thing you do.

Nefertiti 1:14:12

Yeah, well, that's me. You know, I have a little bit of every continent on the planet except Antarctica and how I wish that I was related to the penguins, but I don't have that. Right? Yes. So I'm very passionate again about intertwining things, different modalities, being inclusive, honoring cultural diversity, and sprinkle with a load of neuroscience because it really makes a world of difference. So everything that I'm doing currently, he has a background in neuroscience. I might not talk about it people might know be aware of it, but it's very intentional. So all my engagements my projects, performances, he has a layer uglies or two, that they are relating to neuroscience. So that's kind of the highlights of what I am right now. But always delighted to connect with a few, you know, people that they might find interesting what I have to say if they want to give it a try themselves and see if it's a suitable match for their pursuit. And it's always good to be experimental. That's how you find new passions and new talent. She was going to try something just for the heck of us.

Keith McKeever 1:15:32

Oh, there's a lot of things in this world that were created by many, many little accidents, right? Yeah, oh, this didn't work. That didn't work. Oh, boom, hey, we got something. So no, that's just just how the world works. So once again, I appreciate you coming on here. Hope everybody goes and likes and follows your social accounts, everything that we're gonna have all that in the show notes for, for the for the viewers or listeners. So I really appreciate you coming on here share with you this is like, like I said, the beginning, fascinating conversation, I think it's this is an area where everybody can go back and examine where they're at, right? Their environment, Zen, what is influencing your decisions, what's impacting your mood and everything every day. There's a lot of takeaways here. But

Nefertiti 1:16:17

this is something and this is something that is suitable for all ages, all genders, which is beautiful, this is no inclusive, or exclusive for one niche, or the other one. It's very welcoming to everybody who wants to engage into that practice, and I can't pay for it, I advocate for it, because I am living proof of what is possible. I was sinking into depression 27 months ago, and this year, I am part of four different books, one of them, it's already Best International seller in Amazon, none of that it would have been possible. If I didn't grounded myself doing the contemplative arts, the therapeutic arts, and then neuroscience. So if I was able to do that, I have all the faith in the world that other people can find their own Holy Grail and be, you know, happily ever after?

Keith McKeever 1:17:16

Absolutely. I think, you know, last thought, before we wrap this up, I know for me, like you said, anybody can do it. So if you're listening to this, and you're interested, check with your spouse, your partner, you know, dive into some of the stuff to work through yourself, work through it with your partner, and maybe your kids even, right, share this it can be it can be kind of a family thing of like, you know, it is gratitude and working through things and how you talk to each other, and how you're just present for everybody. You know, think about what that, you know, could do for that next generation, you know, especially especially speaking to the parents out there, who maybe have kids still home, like, think about what kind of lasting impact that could be, if you if you teach them some of these skills, how to manage their stress and manage their environments, what kind of level of success that can bring for them.

Nefertiti 1:18:09

And it can be tailor for that family orientation. Because, as a matter of fact, I did a program for a group of ladies in Nevada, and I have three generations taking my class, the granddaughter, daughter and the two grandmothers. And it's something that you can go in so many different approaches and directions, you know, you can do it as a solo practice like I do. But it can be a generational activity, like this group of ladies hire me to do a program for them. It can be something with a different twist, where you know, you want to spark a little bit more of you know, romance and intimacy in your relationship with your significant other your spouse, and you can give each other flowers you know, or you can change the floral arrangement when we can take care of that next week. You take care of that and let's wall and surprise each other with flowers. How beautiful is that?

Keith McKeever 1:19:12

Like Bahamas for me, it will mean to him when when you made it with heart with love, versus just going to the store picking up a rose or does

Nefertiti 1:19:21

not. And not only that, but he has your personality reflected on it. Because he's not just a flower and out the door is the enhancement, their doorman the angles? Like a how do you accessorize certain things? What kind of container do you pick for the occasion that it's going to reflect your personality? So you are intertwining, being mindful about somebody important in your environment, but also you have your own way of self expression and creativity. Everything about it is so beautiful and so rich and so beneficial. So I hope that I can spark that passion into fuel for the listeners out there. And I would love to hear comments and maybe a little note, giving me some, some insights of how this conversation worked out for you and what was relevant.

Keith McKeever 1:20:14

Absolutely. Everybody out there, you know, tries to go create their own art because of Inspire being inspired by those posts on social media, tag me in it and tag both of us in there, you know, we want to, we want to see it, let's share it with the world share your Creek, you know, your creative geniuses with everybody else out there. So that's, that's my action item that I asked everybody to do. If you're taking action on this, and you're creating something physically with your hands and sort of artwork. You know, take a picture of it posted out there, and then maybe put a little narrative be vulnerable a little bit and say, I created this and here's how I feel about you know, open up, put put the good stuff out in the universe.

Nefertiti 1:20:51

Well, you know, on that note, I'm going to send you the link to my gallery of pictures. So you can put it on the notes and people can review, like all the different things that you can do with flowers, and they can make their own interpretation of some of those designs. Because that way you have a reference, you have something visual to go by it instead of just a conversation by itself.

Keith McKeever 1:21:15

That's your point. That's helpful, especially for those of us that like picture books and stuff like that, you know, I need an example to go off.

Nefertiti 1:21:24

Oh, you see, I got you calm, or I told

Keith McKeever 1:21:27

that you do that you do. So anyway, you

Nefertiti 1:21:31

know what, I'm going to take it a step farther. I have like a four minute tutorial on how to do a floating arrangement. I'm going to include that on the notes for you too.

Keith McKeever 1:21:43

Awesome. Sounds like it's simple enough that even I could follow those instructions.

Nefertiti 1:21:47

Oh, you should. Okay, that's gonna be

Keith McKeever 1:21:51

my action item. Okay.

Nefertiti 1:21:52

Okay, so we're gonna go, I'm gonna, I'm gonna send you the gallery of pictures and the tutorial. And you're gonna go public at your leisure, but knowing 2023 B, for the end of the year, you're going to make your own arrangement and you're gonna put it social and public out there, and you're going to tag it.

Keith McKeever 1:22:11

Okay, you got it?

Nefertiti 1:22:12

Okay. I'm gonna hold you responsible for the action taking? I know you will. Oh, yeah. Anyway, to get you

Keith McKeever 1:22:22

that you do. Yeah, I'm not I'm not that hard to get a hold of. So anyway. Never TV. I really appreciate the conversation this this is this something else I don't have much more to say about it. Other than that, a lot of a lot of stuff that people can take away from it. And I hope people enjoy it and run with it. And you know, that's this really fits in line with what the whole podcast is founded on is just offering education or inspiration to the veteran and military, spouse community to better their lives. You know, and sometimes it's very, very specific. Sometimes it's more general like this, of just look what's in your environment, start fixing a little something to be consistent, and all those different things we've talked about. So I really I call it goes Hey,

Nefertiti 1:23:07

man, that's my special Yeah, entertainment, because it's entertaining. But I also educate people into things that are new to them. And it's a beautiful thing. I love it.

Keith McKeever 1:23:17

That is so I'll have to get Washington watching your thing. And we'll post it out there and, and we'll get it out there to the world. Everybody will see my creative geniuses.

Nefertiti 1:23:28

Yes. And then you can know tell me any more. Oh, I am not artsy. I am not like we are eradicating that viewing of yourself.

Keith McKeever 1:23:38

Okay. What's that? Let's change the narrative. So

Nefertiti 1:23:41

someone a mission for that. And I'm sending it to you via email. So we've finished this recording much love, appreciation. Thanks for the virtual time and the spotlight. I love you all. And I'm looking forward to make new connections.

Keith McKeever 1:23:59

There you have folks, I hope you enjoyed that was while I told you she was a ball of energy. That was that was a great there's so many bits of information that are valuable. Speaking of value, my about my website is battle buddy podcast.net. As a reminder, I always try and add resources there. So if something's not there you think should be let me know. And the national suicide hotline number is 988 press one. So if you're struggling, remember we want to see you tomorrow. We want you here tomorrow. So call that number

Transcribed by https://otter.ai